Hope for the Caregiver podcast focuses on family caregivers and theology

Hope for the caregiver.com Hope for the caregiver.com all right, now, for the last several weeks, we've been talking about theology. Now, I know that may sound a little strange on a program for caregivers. You may be thinking, peter, I don't need theology. I need somebody to sit with mom for three hours so I can go to the grocery store. I, understand this. I do indeed. But why are you spending three hours at the grocery store? No, I'm just kidding. I'm like a ninja. When I go to the grocery store, I'm in and out and it's 17 miles away. You may need help getting your spouse into the shower. You may need help with the laundry or your insurance company to stop denying something the doctor ordered three months ago. You may need a lot of different things. I get that. I speak fluent caregiver, all right? But I also know that underneath all those practical problems, something else is going on. There are questions we can't answer. My calling the pharmacy. There are problems the insurance companies, they're not going to solve. And there are wounds that don't close because somebody finally showed up to help with the laundry or clean the kitchen, however wonderful that would be. When the suffering goes on long enough, questions start coming out of us. Where is God? What kind of good and loving God would allow this? How long, O Lord? These are the three questions we've been discussing in some form or the other. They are all There are a lot of derivations of this, but they come down to those basic three questions. You may not say them exactly that way. You may say, why is this happening? You may say, why won't somebody help us? You may say, you know, how can she hurt this much? Why won't he stop drinking? Why did the treatment fail? These are all legitimate questions. You know, I don't know how much longer I can do this. You know, that's caregiver language. alright, let me translate that for you. A great deal of the time what we're really asking is where's going? Does he see this? Does he care? Can he be trusted? How long is he going to allow this to continue? Those are theological questions. Before you ever tuned into this program, Hope for the Caregiver and listen to some guy talk about family caregivers, you were already discussing theology in your circumstance. Not at church necessarily, not in Sunday school class where you're talking about theological principles and you're learning discipleship or you go through the book of Romans or whatever. Or maybe you've never even been to church. Maybe that's not even been on your radar. Maybe somebody just sent you a, link to the show or to the podcast. I have doctors out there that are sending this podcast out to spouses of their patients, family members of their patients. Maybe you're one of those people that just got this and you're thinking, who is this guy? Yes, he has spectacular incandescent white hair. But why am I listening to him? You know, why are we here? Why are we having a conversation about theology?

Where is God when a child is injured or killed

But over the last couple of programs we've stayed with that first question, where is God? Because that's where a lot of caregivers spend some time. And I told you about standing, in the prosthetic clinic in Ghana with our team one time and a four year old boy named Benjamin lost his leg after being struck by a vehicle and went. One of the team members said, you know, where, where was God when this little boy was hurt? I told him God was right there. Same thing about Gracie's wreck, same thing about all the other things that go on in life. But I also later realized my answer was incomplete. Saying God watched it happen. Made God sound like a spectator. He's not, he's not sitting in the bleachers watching our lives or he's, or in box seats, if you will. he's not waiting for somebody to notify him that something terrible has happened. He doesn't play defense. Psalm, 139 says, where shall I go from your spirit, or where shall I flee from your presence? If I send to heaven, you're there. If I make my bed in the grave, you're there. If I go to the furthest reaches of the sea, you're there. There is nowhere in creation where God is absent. That includes the scene of an accident. That includes a hospital operating suite. That includes a mortuary. That Includes divorce court. That includes a rehab center. He's already there. He's there at two in the morning at your kitchen table. He's there. He's waiting for us in that moment. And he shepherded us all the way to it, and he will shepherd us through it. That does not make the moment painless. It does not answer every question. In some ways, it creates a harder question. If God was there, if he knew it was happening, if he possessed the power to stop it, why did he allow it? That is a question that has plagued so much, so many people since the Garden. We're going to get there, but I don't want to rush past something. Okay? I just. We're going to take this in little tiny bites here, but let's think about this a. Slow down. The question we're already asking is, where's God? Okay? That's the question we ask. We. You'll get there eventually if you haven't been there as a caregiver. Give it time. You will.

The first question God asks man in scripture is where are you

But the first question God ask a human being in scripture is also where question God asked Adam, where are you? Think about that for just a moment. Now, God repeated that question to Job at the end of Job, and he said, where were you when I was doing all this? But let's. Let's get back to the garden here. Go back even further. God said to Adam, where are you now? Did God lose Adam? Was he wandering through the garden? Said, where did that boy go? Of course not. God knew exactly where Adam was. The question was not about Adam's location. God was calling Adam out of hiding. Adam, where are you? What's happened to you? Why are you hiding from me? Why are you trying to cover yourself? Will you come out here and tell me the truth? The first question God asked man was not because God lacked information. It was because Adam needed to face where he was. And that question reaches all the way into our lives as caregivers. Where are you? Not where's your loved one? Not. Where's the doctor? Not where is the insurance paperwork? Where are you? Are you afraid? Are you angry? Are you exhausted? Are you hiding behind all the work that needs to be done? Are you trying to control something no human being can control? Are you so busy reacting to everybody else's condition you've lost sight of your own? Where are you? Fear makes us all want to hide. Adam said it himself. I was afraid and I hid. This may be one of the most honest statements in scripture. I was afraid. How many caregivers understand fear? I was Afraid when the phone rang. I was afraid when the doctor walked in the room. I was afraid when I saw the test results. I remember looking at the test results of my cancer earlier this year. I'm sitting in my office looking at that. I hadn't told Gracie yet. I'm just looking at it. I saw it, posted my chart, and I was like, well, that's just great, you know? And my first question was, what am I going to do about Gracie? That's the first question I thought about. What? The Gracie factor. I'm looking at my own diagnosis of cancer, and I'm thinking about my journey as a caregiver. You know, I was afraid when I saw this. I was afraid, looking at your bank account. How many of you get afraid looking at your bank account? That's pretty regular for me. I was afraid when I thought about what would happen if something happened to me. I was afraid and I hid. And sometimes we hide inside our business, and sometimes we hide behind competence. We become the person who knows every medication, every doctor, every appointment, every insurance code, and every possible thing that could go wrong. And everybody looks at us and says, I don't know how you do it. How many times have somebody said to you, I don't know how you do this? I can't count how many times they said it to me. I'm pretty good at what I do. I've got a pastor friend of mine that said, peter, you do yourself a disservice. I said, what do you mean? He said, you make this look easier than it is. People have no idea what you carry. Meanwhile, we're scared out of our minds. And we hide sometimes in the anger or behind humor or by trying to fix everybody around us. Or sometimes we hide in the bathroom and cry as quietly as possible because we don't want the person we're caring for to hear us. And God asks, where are you? He's not asking because he doesn't know. We're going to talk about this some more when we come back. I'm delving into these things because I spent a lifetime reacting and floundering around and basically just being stupid. You know, where's God? God, why are you doing this? Da, da, da. I got tired of those questions. After 40 years, you do get tired of those questions. And I thought, you know what? I'm going to deal with these questions in my life. I'm going to ask these of myself, and I'm going to go to scripture and see what scripture has to say, and I'm going to learn about this God that I profess to believe in. We're going to talk about that more when we come back.

American Family Radio is listener supported; without you, this show would not exist

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Jim Scudder: Trusting Jesus is like sitting in a chair

Jeff Chamblee Hi, Jim Scudder here for today's moment in grace. Have you ever sat in a chair and really thought about whether it would hold you up? Probably not. You just sit down, and that is faith. Trusting Jesus is like sitting in a chair. You're not admiring the chair, you're putting your full weight on it. And you don't tie a rope to the ceiling just in case. Here's where many people miss it. They trust Jesus and their good works, Jesus and their church attendance. That, my friends, is holding a rope while sitting in a chair. It's not faith, it's insurance. So stop striving, sit down, rest in him completely. You are not holding on to Jesus. he's holding on to you. And he will never let go. For more daily encouragement, visit ingraceradio.com.

Peter Rosenberg: Where are you now as a caregiver

Peter Rosenberger Welcome back to Hope for the Caregiver. This is Peter Rosenberg. Glad that you are with me today. Hopeforthecaregiver.com hopefor the caregiver.com before the break, we looked at the first question that God asked Adam after Adam sinned and he hid among the trees. Where are you now? That's the question a lot of caregivers ask of God. But that was the first question God asked of fallen, sinful man. Where are you? God knew where Adam was. Adam was the one who needed to recognize where he was. So let me ask you again. Where are you as a caregiver? Or more specifically, if the Lord's asking you that question, can you answer it honestly, like Adam did? Adam said, I was afraid and I hit. That's pretty honest answer. But if the Lord asked me, he asked you as caregivers, as human beings, where are you? Can we say, you know, Lord, I'm frightened, I'm angry, I'm exhausted. I don't know what to do. I've been trying to hold this whole thing together. I can't. I've been pretending that I'm stronger than I am. I mean, carrying things that don't belong to me. I'm hiding behind whatever else. Busyness, freneticness, sometimes.

Dr. Jessica Peck Hm.

Peter Rosenberger You know, you can hide behind resentment. It makes you feel powerful to carry resentment. It's one of the most delicious sins of all because it makes you feel powerful, because you just indulge yourself in thinking about all the things that vindicate you and how these people are whatever. You get the point. We hide behind all kinds of things. Vices we take, things. Sex, drugs, whatever, alcohol. We hide behind all kinds of things. Sometimes we hide behind religiosity. And we become one of these people that just spout off all this stuff. Like that lady I told you about a couple weeks ago when there was an ice storm and she had powered her house and so many were without it. And I called to check on friends of mine that were staying at her house. And I could hear in the background saying, no weapon formed against us shall prosper. And I'm thinking, oh, bless your heart. I mean, that's just a level of cluelessness. And some people hide behind that type of God speak. God already knows. He knows what you do, and he knows that you're hiding. You're not giving him new information, but you're finally telling him the truth about where you are. This isn't a lecture that I'm giving here. This is not a theological exercise that we're going through as caregivers. This is caregivers standing at the kitchen at 2 in the morning saying, here I am, Lord. I don't understand what you are doing. I don't like what is happening. I am frightened about tomorrow. And tomorrow is already here. It's two in the morning, and tomorrow, daylight will be here in a couple hours, but here I am. And that's a place where we can begin as caregivers.

Do you believe a real God exists? Whether you understand him or not

Now, let's return to the question we ask where is God? Well, if you walk into your house and call out, where are you? You're assuming that somebody is there. You're not asking whether that person exists. You're asking where that person is. When a Christian cries out, where is God? We're already saying something. We're saying that we believe there is a God. At least we say, we believe that caregivers pray some of the shortest prayers ever prayed. Lord, help me. Help my unbelief. That's one of my favorites of scripture. Please, not again. Lord. God, I can't do this. How long? Sometimes the only prayer we can form is just to say Jesus. But I think about what you're saying when you pray, that when you're praying, God help me, you're saying that God exists. You were saying that he hears you. The implications of what you're saying go so deep here. You're saying that he knows where you are. You're saying that he possesses the power to help. Your prayer, however small it is, however pitiful it is, however it is whispered out through, trembling lips, is packed with theology. You probably don't feel like a theologian. You probably feel like a caregiver trying not to come apart. But you're making a statement about God. Let's stop right there, Christian. Do you believe that there is a God? I'm not asking whether you grew up in church. I'm not asking whether your parents believed in God. I'm not asking whether you have a Bible somewhere in your house or whether you know the words to Amazing Grace. I'm asking you whether you believe there is a real God. Not an idea, not a religious feeling, not a comforting thought. We pull out when the doctor gives us bad news, but a backup plan that we keep behind glass with a little sign that says, breaking case of emergency. I'm talking about, do you believe a real God exists? Whether you are calm or panicked, whether you understand him or not, or whether you approve of what he is doing or not. Do you believe this? Hebrews 11:6 says, Whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him. Must believe that he exists. That's the starting point. The Bible begins the same way. In the beginning, God. It does not say, in the beginning, there was a caregiver with a clipboard trying to keep everybody alive. It says, in the beginning, God. Before there was a garden, there was God. Before there was a diagnosis, there was God. Before there was an accident, there was God. before there was a hospital or wheelchair or a pill Organizer or an insurance company or a nursing home or stacks of bills. There was God. And when all those things are gone, there will be God. He will still be. Theological term is a saty being within himself. He is a being. That's why the big bang theory doesn't work. These things didn't spontaneously combust because that means that they have being in of themselves, that they are eternal, not created. That that's not, rocks and gas have being within themselves. That's what they're telling you. Only God has a satiety being within himself, self sufficient. He doesn't begin when I become aware of him and he doesn't disappear when I can't feel him. He doesn't cease to exist because my circumstances no longer make sense to me. And that is really important for us as caregivers because our circumstances change constantly. The temperature goes up, the blood pressure goes down, the blood pressure goes up. The scan shows something new. You get a cancer diagnosis posted to your chart. The doctor changes the treatment. There's so many different things going on. Our person that we're caring for has a good day or the next day. Everything falls apart. Our emotions move with all of it. We feel hopeful in the morning and devastated by lunch. But God does not appear and disappear with the numbers on the monitor. God is. That's what he told Moses. I am now believing that God exists is not some kind of transaction. We do not say, all right, God, I believe in you now you have to make this turn out the way I want. Faith isn't a lever that we pull to make God do something. We do not place enough belief into a machine and receive healing in return. We don't squint our eyes real hard when we pray. And somehow this is all going to work out. That's not Christianity. And yet that's being promulgated. Some of you've heard that, some of you've heard that this week from pastors or friends or church fellow churchgoers, whatever, that you know that will say these things. And there's nothing that frost my grommet more than when I hear that kind of stuff. I've had that stuff levied at me and Gracie for a lifetime and I push back hard on it. But that's a conversation for another day.

As caregivers, we can become extremely skilled in crisis

We're talking about now, just the basics here, that God is not obligated to follow my plan because I've acknowledged his existence. But if I say there is a God, then that, yes, that there is a God has implications for me. And that's where we're starting as caregivers, you and me, today, right now, I can't say, yes, I believe there is a God, and then live as if the throne is vacant and everything depends on me. Okay? I did that for years. I spent a lifetime reacting and despising. I mean, it's embarrassing, you know? The phone rang and I reacted. A machine beep. I reacted. Gracie cried out, I reacted. Dr. Walked in the room, I reacted to Bill arrived. I reacted a lot with those. And I, spent a lifetime of this. All it did was get me more tired, make my hair beautifully incandescent white. But yes, it is white. I have four brothers, and I have whiter hair than all of them put together. My father died at 89, and I have whiter hair than he did. All that's done is just make me look old and worn out. I really am thinking about writing a book called Exhausted. Why do you ask? I think I will do that. And I know I'm not alone on this. This is what caregivers, you know, when we react quickly, sometimes we say things quickly, we pop off or whatever. I get that. When somebody falls, that's not the time to sit down and work through a theology textbook. You help them. When somebody can't breathe, you call for help. When somebody coats, you call for help. Been there, done that. When the doctor misses something, you speak up. Been there, done that. That's our responsibility. That's part of the journey. But you can't build your entire understanding of, hopping from one emergency to the next. You can't allow every new crisis to redefine what is true. And we can become extremely skilled in crisis. We learn how to read the room. We become hyper vigilant. You know, and we know what every sound means. We can tell what something is wrong before anybody else notices. I can look at Gracie and know that something is off sometimes before a machine can register it. Those skills are important, okay? They matter. And they've helped protect her many, many, many, many times. But being observant is not the same thing as being omniscient. Being responsible is not the same thing as being sovereign. And being good in a crisis does not make me God. That may sound obvious, but look how we live. We try to know everything. We try to anticipate everything. We try to prevent everything. We try to control every outcome. We stay awake because we believe our vigilance is the only thing holding the world together. We think, if I close my eyes, something's going to happen, and something may happen. And that is Part of what makes this so difficult. But staying awake all night doesn't make me sovereign. And worrying about tomorrow does not give me control over tomorrow. Pastor friend of mine told me, said, be careful with your prayer life. It's liable to upset your worry life. We worry about a lot of things. I can exhaust myself trying to possess knowledge and power that no human being has, and then I collapse under the weight, wonder where God is. Perhaps before I ask God, where are you? I need to answer him when he asked peter, where are you? And oftentimes the answer is, lord, I'm standing where only you belong. I'm in the wrong place. I'm trying to carry something that doesn't belong to me. I'm trying to do something that's not mine to do. I'm trying to guarantee an outcome that's not mine to guarantee. I'm trying to save somebody who's already got a savior. And at some point, we have to stop, we have to turn, and we have to face reality, and we have to ask ourselves some hard question. What do I actually believe? And why do I believe it? And am I willing to live with the implications of that belief? At some point, we got to land on a square, and we've already identified the first square. There is a God. Second square is, I ain't him. And that is not God belittling me. that's not God saying my work doesn't matter. It's not permission for me to become careless or indifferent. It's an invitation to put down what doesn't belong to me, what does belong to me and what doesn't belong to me. And if you've listened to this program for any length of time, you've heard me say that over the years. A reporter asked me one time a long time ago, what is the hardest thing you deal with as a caregiver? And without question, it is knowing what is mine and what is not mine. And I struggle with that mightily. And I learned through that process that my wife has a savior, and I am not that savior. There is a God.

Dr. Robert Jeffress explains why not all roads lead to heaven

I am not that God. And that is hope for this caregiver. We'll be right back.

Jeff Chamblee Jesus made a bold claim. I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. But in our inclusive world, that truth is often called intolerant. This week on pathway to victory, Dr. Robert Jeffress explains why not all roads lead to heaven and points us to the eternal home Christ has prepared.

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Kayleigh ​Bush My name is Kailee Bush, and I am just your regular small town daddy's girl. four weeks after I had won the title of Miss North Florida, I was asked to sign a contract. Quote, female means a born female or an individual who has fully completed sex reassignment surgery. I declined to sign, resulting in the loss of my title, any scholarship opportunities.

Jeff Chamblee So we demanded that they rescind it,

Peter Rosenberger but unfortunately they would not.

Kayleigh ​Bush Today I'm standing to preserve sisterhood, the foundation of Miss America. But how can it be a sisterhood if the door is open to brothers? I believe that biologists is real and that no boy is born in the wrong body. You know what makes people a leader is them following their convictions boldly and courageously.

Jeff Chamblee She wanted her integrity more than the

Peter Rosenberger crown and she wanted to follow our Lord Jesus Christ more than Miss America. Watch Kaylee's story [email protected] impact.

Peter Rosenberger hosts Hope for the Caregiver podcast

Welcome back to Hope for the Caregiver. This is Peter Rosenberger. Glad to be with you. Hope for the caregiver.com hopeforthecaregiver.com by the way, I just as a programming note and everything else we do, visit caregiver.substack.com that's where I keep a library of all of this program. I've got the podcast, of course as well, but I've got video, I've got print, I've got articles that I've put out there I think you're going to find very meaningful. Caregiver.substack.com Pretty much everything I put out there is not behind a paywall. It does go behind a paywall after two weeks, just that's what the library is. And it's only $5 a month and you'd have access to all of it. But everything I put out there pretty much is. You could read it, just sign up for it. There it is. So take advantage of it. Caregiver substack.com if you want more information. There was not stuff like this for me. I mean, people spoke to me, they spoke into my situation, but nobody really knew how to penetrate down to the depths of where I live as a caregiver. I started having to learn to do that to myself. And now I'm teaching what I've learned through the process. I'm, just one beggar showing another beggar where the bread is. That's it. And I've learned these things, and I'm learning these things. I've wrestled with these questions. And, you know, the nice thing about banging your head up against a brick wall is it feels so good when you stop. That's kind of my life.

Question of where is God comes from the question of is there a God

So we're delving into this thing and, and before the break, we, we landed on a very simple statement. There is a God. I'm not Him. I know that sounds really stupid and basic, but sometimes you got to go back to the fundamentals. I have found that when a sports team is in trouble, you know, you don't go try to learn a trick play. You go back to the fundamentals. And God is not belittling us. It doesn't mean that our work is not important. It just means we now have a, ah, proper hierarchy and understanding and perspective of who we are in the scope of things. More importantly, learning more about who he is. Because if we're asking, where is God? We have to stop and wrestle with the implications that we're saying that there is a God. Do we know Him? Do we know what his characteristics are? Does he change? Is he immutable or immutable? Is he unchanging or changing? All of these questions stem from the question of is there a God? And we're just automatically saying, where are you God? But the implications of what we're saying is. Wait a minute. You're saying that if you're asking where he is, you're saying that he is not omniscient, that he is somehow distant from you. But is that what scripture says? Scripture says he is near to the brokenhearted. Scripture says, where can I go that you're not there, you understand? So our speech needs to reflect what we believe and vice versa. You know, we need to, we need to be precise on what we're saying here. Think through what we're saying. We allow ourselves as caregivers to react for a while. I get that. I get that, I've done it for a lifetime, longer than my share. I mean, I have spazzed out so many times, it truly is embarrassing. And, you know, I have to just cover my head in the bag because I'M just embarrassed by it. I'm a slow learner. All right, here we are. But here's what I'm learning through this. Here's what I've learned, and here's what I'm learning. And that the things that come out of our mouth reflect certain things in our heart, and they also come with implications. So when I am asking, that question, where are you, Lord? What is the implication?

The most effective theological questions are usually asked in the midst of suffering

Okay, now we're having a theological conversation, and everything we do is theological. And I'm not talking about the kind that comes to our mind. I think when we think of this, we think of professors with tweed jackets and sitting in classrooms and talk about lofty ideals. I honestly believe that the most honest and effective theological questions we ask are usually in the midst of suffering. And that's why you have this book called the Book of Job in the Bible that is one of the oddest books in there. For 38 chapters, roughly, the Holy Spirit superintends a conversation that is rife with bad theology. Job's friends are arguing back and forth on speculating why God did this. None of them got it right. The only one that got close to it was the young man, Elie, who, Elihu or whatever his name was. And at the end of none of them got it right. And when God shows up in the whirlwind afterwards and he speaks to Job and he asked these questions, where were you? Where were you? Where were you? Where were you when I was doing this? Where were you doing this? And the questions become the teaching tool. And Joe basically just has to put his hand over his mouth and he has to just say, you know, I just crawl in the dust here. And there was. It was such a moment. And for those of us in the midst of these things that are relentless, this is where we live as caregivers. We're looking at suffering, we're looking at sorrow, we're looking at loss, we're looking at impairment on a day to day basis, sometimes on a minute to minute basis. And it forces things out of us way down in the basement of our souls, that normal situations allow people to kind of float in and out of that stuff. But with caregiving, it's ever present, it's always up in our faces and we cry out to these things. And it's understandable. Everybody does, but not everybody does this for decades. And at some point you have to wrestle with it. You have to stop in the middle of all the thrashing about and you've got to wrestle with these things. Let, Me, Let me take it out of that for just a moment, if you'll indulge me. Gracie lives with chronic pain, severe chronic pain. She has not known a day without it since Ronald Reagan's first term. Now, you think about that for a moment. Now, what do we do when we're in pain? What do we want? We want relief. And, you know, if you ever notice, Jerry Seinfeld did a bit on this a long time ago about, there's no more regular strength medication. You go to any, you know, pharmacy or whatever, and it's all maximum strength, you know, over the counter stuff. It's all maximum strength. It's like whatever will kill the human body. Back it off just a little bit, that's what I want. You know, it's maximum. This is the most we can give you without killing you. And we cry out immediately for relief. And we're, we're just. Our whole world is shaped by this. If you have a toothache, if you've got something wrong with your foot, if you've got a splinter or something like that, get a splinter in your hand, and every time you move your hand or something, you feel it, and your whole world is consumed by it, or backaches and so forth, whatever. As long as there's a constant pain signal, it's going to consume your attention and focus your thoughts on what's causing the pain. And it needs to be relieved at all costs. Okay? And we get that. We get that concept. That's why we go to the doctor, that's why we go to the dentist. That's why, you know, we take the tweezers and get the splinter out. Whatever. We get that pain is letting us know that something's wrong. But now when pain doesn't go away, and it's not going to go away, Gracie's going to wake up tomorrow and be in just as much pain tomorrow. She is today. It is not an ebb and flow with her, It's a constant. And I was talking to Joni Eareckson, Tada. when we did a video interview the other day, and you heard the clips of it on this program a couple weeks ago, she's got a new book out, it's called Keeping Faith when life hurts 100 devotions for hard Days. And I said, joni, when do you not have a hard day? What is not a hard day for you? And she said, when my pain is about a level five. Well, the implication is that the pain never goes away. And when it doesn't go away, you gotta Wrestle with a philosophical approach to life. I've maintained for years that a chronic pain patient, like Gracie, like Johnny, it is a philosophical approach to pain management. No longer an acute pain management. It hurts, I gotta do something to relieve the suffering, and then it's all better. That's, acute. Chronic is different. Chronic means it's not going to go away. And so you got to learn how to live with it. You've got to learn how to cope with it. Gracie can be out of pain today, but she would have to be so sedated or so drugged up that she wouldn't be able to function. They'd have to give her so much local anesthesia, maybe her mind would work, but her body then would be numb and she couldn't function. So do you see where I'm going with this? With our spirits, with the way we process pain in our hearts. If it's relentless, if the things we're dealing with don't go away, we can't just throw stuff at it to medicate it and numb it or take it away. It's not going to be solved. So we got to learn how to deal with it.

One of the pains that we deal with is our separation from God

And one of the pains that we deal with, maybe the pain we deal with, is our separation from God. And so that's why we ask this question, where is God? Why would we even ask such a question of an omniscient sovereign being? Where is He? He's everywhere. But we ask that question, why? Why do we ask that? Because we're in such agony, such distress, that it overrides the truth of what Scripture tells us. That he's everywhere, that he is here, that he is ever present. He is near to the brokenhearted. And we have to remind ourselves of this. Why do we have to remind ourselves of this? Because sin broke our brains. I mean, that's just the bottom line. Our brains are broken. our hearts are messed up, and we need a new heart. And we have to be reminded of this because we have a nature that is in enmity with God, and we want to go hide from Him. And so we're saying, where's God? And he said, where are you? Thou changes not thy compassions. They fail not, the hymn writer says. And yet we're saying, where are you, God? Where are you? And all of these things reflect an accusatory stance, but they also reflect our broken brains. I'm sorry, we do. We got broken brains. Some of us are more broken than others. I would put myself at the top of that list. I mean, we're just Broken brains. We don't think right. And what does Scripture say about our thinking? Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Let this mind be in you, which is also in Christ Jesus. Jesus's brain wasn't broken. If you go back and look at when he was 12 years old and they were. He was at the temple and he was talking to these, all these teachers, of the law, and they were astounded. And I've heard multiple teachers say the reason they were astounded is because of the way his mind worked. It wasn't encumbered by sin. How many times did you hear him say things? When you see a scripture, when you read it, and, and you see him being.

Dr. Jessica Peck Trying.

Peter Rosenberger They're trying to trap him, and he'll say these things. And they marveled at his mind. It's not encumbered by sin. One day ours won't be either. Can you imagine? Can you imagine such a day? We'll be able to think clearly, but we can't right now. And so we have to remind ourselves that it's not our thoughts, but his that we focus on. Let me give you a few of them. Colossians 3, 1, 2. If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. Philippians 4, 8. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Romans 8:5,6. For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh. But those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace. My favorite is Isaiah 26:3. Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace whose mind mind is stayed on thee because he trust in thee, because he trusted the Lord. That is hope for the caregiver. We'll be right back. I'll never forget walking into the hospital room after Gracie had her second amputation. Both legs are gone now. And she looked at me. She said, I know what I'm going to do. And I was kind of startled. What are you going to do? She said, I'm going to help provide prosthetic limbs to my fellow amputees and tell them about Jesus. And I said, well, baby, can we get out of the hospital first? But she never let it go. And for almost 20 years, we've been working out of Ghana, West Africa. We treat patients all over there from other countries that come there. We send supplies, we send teams, we sponsor patients. We work with a prison where inmates volunteer to disassemble used prosthetic limbs so we can recycle the parts. All of this because Gracie trusted God with her heartache. We've got a huge shipment of supplies that is being loaded up right now to go out soon. Would you help us do it? Standingwithhope.com giving standingwithhope.com giving there's prosthetic feet, knees, pylons, sleeves, adapters, all kinds of connectors. All of these things we are sending over there so that people can walk. We're going to point them to Christ. Help us out. Standingwithope.com giving I'm Rick Scarborough, and this is my take.

Abraham Hamilton III Public schools are the duty to protect children, not expose them to pornographic and sexually explicit materials unsuitable for kids of any age. We carefully restrict minors access to explicit or dangerous content everywhere else. Compulsory attendance means schools owe families extra care, not unilateral power to override parental judgment on intimate subjects like sexuality. Difficult themes, trauma, identity abuse can be taught with nuance and honesty without graphic depiction. Reasonable content standards aren't censorship, they're basic stewardship. Exploring pornographic material doesn't belong in public institutions serving of any age. Parents must engage directly with local school boards to know what's happening and push for change where needed. I'm Rick Scarborough, and that's my take. We're fighting this battle, and if you'd like to help us, go to recoveramerica.com.

Peter Rosenberger tackles theological issues as a caregiver

Peter Rosenberger Welcome back to Hope for the Caregiver. This is Peter Rosenberger. Glad to be with you. Thank you for hanging in there with me as I tackle these issues, because I think this is where we as caregivers live. At least this is where I live. I don't wake up every day trying to figure out how to dress a wound or how to cook or how to do laundry or how to iron, how to pick up scripts, how to deal with doctors or insurance companies. I got that. Got it long time ago. But I do struggle every day with the matters of the heart of theology issues, the things of God, a good and loving God, allowing such pain, such loss, such suffering. How long, O Lord? These are questions that every caregiver is going to eventually get to. You look at suffering and impairment long enough and you're going to have These conversations, they're always theological conversations. So we might as well go ahead and jump into the deep end of the pool and start talking about it more and more and more so that we are anchored in these things.

Standing With Hope is raising funds for prosthetics and family caregiver outreach

All right. And we're going to get back to that here in just a moment. Also want to tell you all, I've got a prosthetic shipment. It's landing in Ghana next week. it takes about 10 days or so. We send it out filled with a bunch of prosthetic feet and liners and sleeves and so forth. And then I've got a shipment of Bibles and hymnals that we're going to send. But I'm holding off on that just a little bit longer because we need to raise a little bit more money for this, a little more expensive than I anticipated. And I would welcome the help at Standing with Hope, which is the presenting sponsor of this program, the ministry. Gracie and I found we have two outreaches, a prosthetic limb outreach and the family caregiver outreach to Gracie's fellow, amputees and to my fellow caregivers. Is that simple for the wounded and those who care for them. And if you want to help, be a part of that with a tax deductible gift right now, you can do [email protected] giving. You can designate it for the prostate limb outreach for shipping, and it'll go right to that. That's what we're trying to do. It's about 5,000. Actually about $5,700 for. For both shipments and. And I would welcome the help of doing this. And, if you find value in what I'm doing here on this program, then you can help us sponsor that particular side of the ministry as well. You can whatever you want on the website there and tell us where you want it to go. We're a very small organization, mom and pop. Mostly pop. And yet we've been doing this now for a very long time, and we would welcome the help. So you could go out [email protected] also sign up for our E letter. I'll be letting you know soon when our new caregiver calendar will be coming out and taking a lot of pictures. I post them on my Facebook page for caregivers at Hope for the Caregiver on Facebook if you want to go see some of them. And I'll put it out there sometimes and ask, the folks there said, do you think this ought to make the calendar? And some people say yes, some people say no. So you could judge for yourself if you wanted. But I put up pictures I take out here at our home in Montana, and I put a quote on there for caregivers. They're beautiful calendars. And it's one of the ways that we help raise funds for Standing With Hope as well. So you can find out more about that.

Edward Mote wrote this hymn around a dying woman in 1834

Well, let's get back to our discussion for today before the break. Again, I was talking about how sin broke our brains. And, we are. I mean, that's just the way it is. And that leads me to the hymn that every caregiver ought to know. And we've been doing this series for a while, and I get a lot of letters and phone calls and texts from listeners, in this audience who appreciate these hymns. And the hymn I want to do today is one we did almost a year ago when I started this, series. But it fits very well with what I'm talking about today, about anchoring us. And there's a particular verse in this hymn that I truly, love. Edward Mote wrote this thing. He wasn't a theologian. I don't know that he actually even grew up in the church or anything else like that. He entered adulthood, I think, virtually knowing nothing about God, but eventually became a Christian. And he worked as a cabinet maker. And one morning in 1834, he was walking to work through London, and he decided to write a hymn about what he called the gracious experience of a Christian. And as he walked, the chorus came to him. And so he wrote this down. By the end of the day, he had written four verses, and he put them in his pocket. Well, the following Sunday, he met a friend of. His last name was King, and he told Edward Mote that his wife was gravely ill and asked if he would come and visit her. So he went to their home that afternoon. And they normally sang a hymn. The King family did. They normally sang a hymn. They read scripture and prayed together before the evening church service. But when he looked for the hymnal, the man couldn't find it. And Mote said, well, I've got some verses in my pocket. We could sing those. And so they did. He pulled those verses out of this song he'd been working on, and so he sang those. And they. They sung this around the home of a dying woman because somebody couldn't find the hymnal. And she was incredibly comforted by this, and she asked him for a copy. So he went home, sat by the fire, completed the hymn, and he returned it, to her. And she lived for about another Five or six days after that. And he said that the word so perfectly met this dying woman situation that he became convinced that they should be shared. And I'm glad he did, because he had 1,000 copies printed and distributed. And the hymn's original title was the Immutable Basis of a Sinner's Hope. That's a real toe tapper, isn't it? Immutable, of course, means unchanging. The unchanging basis of a sinner's hope. And the title tells us what the hymn is about, but it was not exactly a catchy title. And so I don't think he had a tune they may have recited. Or maybe they had an older tune. William Bradbury didn't write the tune for this thing until 1863. And that was, ah, 30 years afterwards. But this thing was first shared around the bed of a dying woman. And then it became a fixture in every hymnal out there. So let's go over to the caregiver keyboard and I'll surprise you with what this is.

Caregiver: When we're struggling with, where is God

Abraham Hamilton III All right.

Peter Rosenberger We're at the caregiver keyboard. And this hymn, you'll know it.

Dr. Jessica Peck My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus blood and righteousness I dare not trust the sweetest frame but wholly lean on Jesus name On Christ the solid rock I stand all of the

Abraham Hamilton III ground

Dr. Jessica Peck is sinking sand all other ground is sinking sand It's a great hymn.

Abraham Hamilton III Hm.

Peter Rosenberger When we're struggling with, where is God? Where's all these things? Our brain is broken. So this is. Then here's the second verse.

Dr. Jessica Peck When, darkness veils his light Lovely

Peter Rosenberger face it's not that he's gone Darkness veils his lovely face the hymn writer knew this.

Dr. Jessica Peck I rest on his, unchanging grace,

Peter Rosenberger Immutable grace, Unchanging grace. Remember, he changes not in every high.

Dr. Jessica Peck Huh? And stormy gale my anchor holds.

Peter Rosenberger That's how we do it. We're anchored to this, okay. This keeps us from flying all over the place and spazzing like I did for a lifetime.

Dr. Jessica Peck Because on Christ the solid rock I stand all other ground you're sinking sand all mother ground is sinking sin and

Peter Rosenberger then, of course, you get that last verse.

Dr. Jessica Peck When he shall come with trumpet sound oh, may I then in him be

Peter Rosenberger found and it's not may I be like, It's a question. It's, oh, may I be. Then you know that it's a. It's that yearning and that plea. It's not a. It's not a question.

Dr. Jessica Peck Dressed in his righteousness alone faultless to stand before the throne on Christ, the solid.

Peter Rosenberger All other ground, even at two in the morning when you're having a meltdown, is sinking sand.

Dr. Jessica Peck All other ground is sinking sand.

Peter Rosenberger Now, you know why that's a hymn that every caregiver ought to know. So when we ask that question, where is God? I'd like for you to think about what I said today and then anchor yourself in this text. And in the middle of the night, when it all comes crashing down on you and you really are despairing, when you open up your wallet, you look at it, you look at your checking account, and all these things you go. When darkness veils his lovely face, I rest on his unchanging grace. Just that line alone. I, rest on his unchanging grace. His grace is not flitting around. He doesn't wake up one day and have less grace. He doesn't wake up. He doesn't sleep or slumber, but he doesn't have. Okay, I got. I'm running out of grace today, so I'm just going to dole it out a little bit. No, no. It's his unchanging grace. Why is that important to us as caregivers? Because that's the constant. We live in this world of ours right now filled with so many changing things. What's constant besides the craziness in our life? But superintending all of that over all of those things, he's constant. And then he goes into every high and stormy gale. Well, we have a lot of high and stormy gales, wouldn't you say, as, caregivers. That pretty much describes, you know, every day, by the way, Monday's Labor Day. You know what? That means nothing to me as a caregiver means that everybody else is taking a day off. But I was talking to a friend of mine, said, oh, we got a short week this week. And I'm like, well, you do. I don't. in fact, I'm going to have even a longer week because I don't have anybody helping. So, you know, in every high, and stormy gale, you know, that means Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Stormy gale. But my anchor holds within the veil. Again, Edward Mote really understood this. He said, you know, we can't see it, but that doesn't mean it's not there. So when you ask, where is God? But remember this hymn, because it's Hope for this Caregiver. This is Peter Rosenberger. This is Hope for the Caregiver. We'll see you next time.