Guest Host, Alex McFarland, is joined by Zach Clinton, Ph.D., LPC, Executive Vice President of the American Association of Christian Counselors (AACC)
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Hamilton: God called believers to be ambassadors even in this dark moment
>> Alex McFarland: Darkness is not an affirmative force. It simply reoccupies the space vacated by the light.
>> Ed Vitagliano: This is the, Hamilton Corner on American Family Radio.
>> Alex McFarland: It should be uncomfortable for a believer
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: to live as a hypocrite, delivering people
>> Ed Vitagliano: out of the bondage of mainstream media and the philosophies of this world.
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: God has called you and me to
>> Alex McFarland: be his ambassadors even in this dark moment. Let's not miss our moment.
>> Ed Vitagliano: And, now, the Hamilton Corner.
>> Alex McFarland: You know, in the Bible, in God's word, when Adam was in the garden, and this is before the fall of Genesis 3, God looked and saw that there was something less than ideal. He said, it is not good for man to be alone.
American Family Radio Network welcomes Dr. Zachary Clinton to talk about relationships
Hi, Alex McFarland here and welcome to the program. Very honored to be on with you tonight. And we have a fantastic guest because we're going to be talking about relationships and, you know, human beings. We were made for relationship. Obviously the most important, the most primary relationship is our relationship with the Lord and to know God through a relationship with Jesus Christ. But then the foundational building block of civilization, the family. And I've said this many times, I believe it passionately that every, everything rises or falls with the state of the family. And in the family we learn about relationships and we learn about grace and we learn about forgiveness and accountability. And so relationships are so vitally important. And I'm always excited when I ever, meet someone that God is using in a great way to help foster and build healthy relationships. And in the home, in the church, in the community. And we're always, I believe every generation has the calling and really the privilege to always kind of be passing the baton to the children and the youth coming up and to help them become everything God intended them to be. And relationships are so vitally a part of that. And with that being said, I'm so excited, for you all to hear from our guest today. Dr. Zachary Clinton, PhD. He's the EVP executive vice president of the American association of Christian counselors, AACC. He's part of Liberty University. He's part of Lightcounseling.net and there's just a lot we have in common. One thing, I've for many, many years been friends with his dad, Dr. Tim Clinton, just nationally known, speaker, author, and they are broadcasters. And they have, enriched so many millions of lives, my own family's life included. But Dr. Zach Clinton is with us now, and we're going to hear about so many important things regarding the relationships in all of our lives. Dr. Zach Clinton, thanks for being with us and welcome to the American Family Radio Network.
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Alex, my friend, always a pleasure joining you. I'm really looking forward to our conversation this evening. Thank you so much for having me.
>> Alex McFarland: Well, thank you.
Alex Clinton: Liberty University has played a pivotal role in my life
And, another thing we have in common is just the role Liberty University has played in each one of our lives. I'm a twice grad of Liberty University. I know you are as well. tell us about your doctoral program and what you wrote on, in doing your PhD.
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Yes, Alex, as you mentioned, Liberty University has played, a pivotal and an integral role in my life, in my formational journey. coming out of Liberty Christian Academy, which is the connecting school, having been raised there really my entire life, from preschool all the way through 12th grade graduation day, going on to pursue an undergraduate in business finance, and then, minoring in a sense, in psychology. Dissertation and really study with my love. And that's something that we share as well for sports, especially that of baseball, being able to study the attachments or the relationships that actually impact the flourishing levels of NCAA Division 1 collegiate athletes. So I studying parental attachment, best friend attachment, God attachment, and then actually the pivotal role of a coach, somebody that can be a substitutionary parental figure.
>> Alex McFarland: indeed. That is so powerful. And not a lot is written on that. I know. You know, I never played baseball in college, played up through 10th grade in high school. And you know, by the time I was playing baseball in high school, pitching was really kind of getting to the next level. And, it took about, getting hit with one pitch by college grade baseball, players. I was like, you know what, maybe my baseball season is wrapping up here. But I have great appreciation for those that were able to, like yourself, play at the college level. But, the role of a coach. And more than ever, Dr. Clinton, isn't it true that young people, especially young boys, they need the male role models to encourage, to stretch them, but to model what godly manhood is like. And I really want to devote time talking to this, but thank God for the fathers, thank God for pastors and teachers. But coaches can play an incredibly positive role in the development of young men, can't they?
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Absolutely they can. I think that's the idea here where there's a lot of homes. I mean, some of the stats, are pretty alarming when it comes to fatherlessness. We're in a fatherless epidemic, I would say that's running pretty rampant throughout our culture and society. Some of the stats would reveal that about 24.7 million children, or 33% of our kids live absent of their biological father. Around 23% of children in the United States are raised by a single parent. 80% of those homes being led by single mothers. Children from single parent families are twice as likely, Alex, to suffer from mental health and behavioral problems. Some other statistics, 85% of youth in prison come from fatherless homes. 71% of high school dropouts come from fatherless homes. 90% of all homeless and runaway children are from m fatherless homes. And so when we talk about the identity and the role of a coach, somebody, a teacher, a counselor, whatever it is, somebody that takes that substitutionary role, that can step up, speak up, and step into a moment for a child in need. Every kid I was raised to remember this, every kid needs somebody that's absolutely crazy about them. And a coach has the opportunity, as Billy Graham once said, to be able to impact more kids in a given year than most would be able to impact kids throughout a lifetime. And so what an opportunity, what a pivotal role a coach can most definitely play.
>> Alex McFarland: Praise God. Praise God.
Dr. Clinton Clinton works with teens and young adults through Liberty University
Dr. Clinton, you, you did your PhD, you're a licensed professional counselor. You work closely with teens and young adults, both in, in your practice and through Liberty University and the various avenues like, see, so what, what do you think or what are you seeing are some of the bigger struggles that young people in this generation are grappling with right now?
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: You know, Alex, as I sit across from kids, as you mentioned, youth, I mean four or five year olds, all the way up to those teenage adolescent years into young adulthood, I think a lot of the challenges are pretty similar. a lot of it comes down to identity confusion, just kind of unsure of who they are, not really knowing the story, that they find themselves in, not knowing the author and the perfecter of our faith especially. And so I'm just a big advocate for understanding that. I believe the difference between those who win in life and those who don't comes down to the story that we tell ourselves. And a lot of us are told a false story, in those early developmental years, whether we grew up in a home or we didn't feel wanted or we felt abandoned. A lot of us develop these things that make us believe that we are someone that we are not, or that this world is not a trustworthy place. Those that we're supposed to love, we can't even trust, let alone love in that capacity city. So a lot of the stories are off, I think then comparison in a technology driven world that is continuing to run Rampant. When we're on our phones, we're doom scrolling, we're just surfing the web all the time. A lot of us think that we're behind, we should be further along. And those should be statements can become very crippling, especially for our next generation. When they're looking into somebody else's lane or comparing their life to somebody else's life, comparison is becoming a culprit. And then I think the last thing is a lot of times because of technology, because of phones, there's a lack of community. I think a lot of these kids are being raised in homes where I remember somebody once told me that the punishment used to be go to your room. And nowadays the punishment is get out of your room. Because so many kids are just isolating themselves and they would much rather be alone because I think they live in shame. I think they kind of really struggle with believing that this world is maybe a safe place and they really struggle with this idea of belonging and acceptance. And I think those three things are pretty much the culprits behind a lot of our challenges, especially our mental health and behavioral health challenges amongst our next generation.
>> Alex McFarland: How do you encourage parents to have their kids not like you say, not always comparing themselves? because I mean if you look at, you know, people's social media posts, it's going to be Photoshopped. It's the filters, Photoshop, you know, everybody's got it going on, but me. And there's this dissatisfaction that, well, people of any age, but especially young people, especially adolescents, can feel this dissatisfaction because everybody's everybody's got it wrapped up but me. You know, there's an acronym fomo, Fear of Missing Out. And if the world we see is just the perfect, perfect everything of social media, we're going to just assume that I've been left at the station and the train has gone and I'm left behind. And that's just not at all reality, is it?
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: It's not reality at all. And I think you mentioned it, we live in a comparison culture built on perceived perfection. I think social media really just an engine for human highlight reels where people are constantly posting the great things that they experienced in life, but they never really, even give you an understanding or breath to realize that man, there are a lot of challenges, there are a lot of shortcomings, there are a lot of hardships and moments of suffering that we experience in life as well. And so when we then experience hardships and trials, we almost begin to like OSTRACIZE ourselves and believe that we're the only ones going through that. There's no sense of normalization with suffering. And so I think to parents, a, call to parents. A lot of the time as I'm working with kids, I never just solely work with a child, I work with the family. I bring parents into sessions. I'm always catching them up to speed in the last 10 or 15 minutes so they understand that. But I think the recognition is continuing to provide safety, continuing to see your kids emotionally, continuing to soothe them in times of need, so equipping them with the strategies to realize. And I think really the question is, what do you define as rich within your home? if you're in a sense modeling that it's about things or it's about stuff, or it's about money in the cars and the size of the house or what you look like in appearance, then I think our kids are going to fall in line with that idea of what it means to be rich. But if we're actually placing an emphasis on, no, it's the relational equity, it's being able to have people in your corner, it's building out the things that actually matter. My dad, Alex always tells me this. The modern day definition of the word tragedy is becoming good at the things that don't matter in this life. And as parents we have to model and show our kids that it's the relationships that make us rich. Because most men are poor when all they have is money. And I see that too often within the family unit Alex and I know you have as well.
>> Alex McFarland: Yeah, exactly, exactly.
Alex McFarland: Dr. Zach Clinton says Christians place value in social media
Folks, if you're just tuning in, Alex McFarland here, our guest, Dr. Zach Clinton of Liberty, University AACC. We're going to do this multiple times in this visit today. But Zach, I want you to give your website and how people can follow the vital work that you're doing.
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Yes, you can go to Zach Clinton dot com. There's some podcasts, there's some free resources there, but also you can go to aacc.net and that's really where we have a lot of resources that are clinically excellent but also distinctively Christian to help you find the care and counsel that I think you desire and deserve.
>> Alex McFarland: Amen. you know, let me ask you this. what's the danger? You mentioned our identity, finding our identity. And that's not only, you know, maturing, and launching, but especially as a follower of Christ, that our identity and our worth and our value is in Jesus. But even Christians could define their worth as by how many likes they've got for a post. how dangerous, how concerned are you about that? If I feel good today just based on a, ah, good social media ranking and then my joy, my worth is just evaporated if somebody else gets more likes and clicks, how unhealthy is that? Dr. Clinton?
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Well, the problem if you place your worth, value and identity in your performance is you'll only be as good as the last game, you'll only be as good as your last post, you'll only be as good as the amount of views that you get on your videos, whatever it is. And so that's a detrimental thing because if my worth and value is attached to those things, then all of a sudden what am I going to think about myself when it is a bad day? Because nobody has a good day. Every it's the recognition that we have to place our worth in something eternal. We have to, as Colossians 3 talks about, place our thoughts on things above rather than on things of this world. We can't just ruminate on all of the negative things or in a sense on our self pity. We have to begin to renovate and renew our thoughts daily by spending time in God's word, by spending time in prayer, by drawing our attention to worship each and every day, and by walking in the spirit as Galatians 5:16 talks about. It's just this idea of what does it truly mean for us to realize that man, we are who we are because of whose we are. And my problem here, Alex, I think a lot of kids fall prey into as well is that.
>> Alex McFarland: Hold that thought. Forgive me. Forgive me Zach. We've got to take a break folks. You don't want to miss the rest of this show. Our guest, Dr. Zach Clinton. Relationships and how to Keep Them Healthy. Stay tuned.
>> Ed Vitagliano: Presenting AFA Stream, an online platform that hosts all AFA produced video content including documentaries, church curriculum, American family radio shows and our Cultural Institute series.
>> Jeff King: I would submit that we are a Christian nation and the proof of that is in our founding documents and in the US Constitution itself. Because our founders recognized for the first time in world history that our rights come from God, our Creator, not our government.
>> Ed Vitagliano: AFA Stream is a vital step that we are taking to fulfill our vision to be a leading organization in biblical worldview training for cultural transformation. You'll find top notch resources that address the issues of our day related to marriage, family, the sanctity of life and many others. Start streaming today. Stream.aca.net. Shining light into the darkness. This is the Hamilton corner on American Family Radio.
>> Alex McFarland: Welcome back to the program. We're going to resume our conversation with Dr. Zach Clinton in just a moment.
Alex McFarland is heading to Montana for Biblical Worldview summer camps
But, I want to ask everybody to pray because, as you hear this program, we are heading to Montana for the first of eight summer youth camps. We'll have over 2,000 teenagers in our summer Biblical Worldview camps. We'll be in Florida and Pennsylvania and Montana, Colorado, North Carolina. And so please keep that in prayer every year. And I give God all the glory. But we have, like, last year, 624 kids put their faith in Christ. We have kids that come back multiple summers and they grow in the Lord. And, you know, having been at this about 27 years now, there are alumnus from our camps and conferen conferences and events that are now in ministry, in law, in education. And so I value your prayers. My travel schedule [email protected] by the way, two things I would really, really ask you to pray about and consider coming if you happen to be in this part of the world. June 7 through 10. I'm in Elkin, North Carolina, western North Carolina, part of our Revive Us tour. And we are going to be at, Elkin. And the complete info is there. June 7 through 10. It's an evening every night for four nights. We've got music, we've got special emphasis on youth and family, but calling our nation back to Jesus Christ, which is the hope of America. But then, listen up, everybody. June 20th, I'll be in North Myrtle beach, the Greg Rolls Legacy Theater. Now, for the last three summers, we've had Charlie Kirk, we've had, Frank Turek, a lot of great speakers up and down the coast at Myrtle beach, because Myrtle beach is kind of like Branson, Missouri, all these music theaters which we rent. And we'll have a Revive Us event at the Greg Rolls theater Saturday night, June 20th. it is free, but you do have to register because space is limited. We've got music videos, and we're going to talk about your role in the spiritual awakening that our nation so desperately needs. We're going to be answering questions like, can we know that God exists? And why is there evil in the world? And then, of course, the question, does God really care about me? So, June 20, the Revive US tour in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, one of America's great destinations, and we'd love for you to be there. Go to alexmcfarland.com for complete information.
Dr. Zach Clinton thanks Alex McFarland for joining us tonight
Well, we're going to resume our conversation with Dr. Zach Clinton. And before the break we were talking about relationships and the role that mentors and coaches play. I want to get back to that. But Dr. Clinton, thanks for being with us tonight. And even more importantly, thanks for the work that you're doing throughout our nation in the lives of people. I commend you, sir.
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Alex, I so appreciate you. I always love the time we get to spend together. And again, on behalf of the AACC, my dad, Dr. Tim Clinton, we love and appreciate all the incredible work that God is doing in and through you and his ministry through you as well. I would encourage anybody go wherever Alex McFarland M is because you are going to be blessed and it's going to deeply enrich your life and those that you love.
>> Alex McFarland: Well, you're very kind. God bless you. I appreciate you. I know you know this, but I have to say this. I know your dad and mom are so proud of you and the work that you're doing. I became friends with your dad, Dr. Tim Clinton, when I was at liberty now, ah, like 30 years ago. And he, your, your dad is one of, of the great leaders in our nation. He and I had the privilege of working together with like Dr. James Dobson. And so the respect I have for your family is just beyond measure, Zach. And it's, it's a privilege to deepen and cultivate the friendship with you.
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Most definitely, sir. I love my family. I'm so grateful, honored, privileged to have been raised by two parents that love God, loved each other and loved my sister and I and now my wife and my brother in law and my nieces more than anything in the world. And that has created a great opportunity for us to flourish in this life. So thank you for saying that.
>> Alex McFarland: Amen.
Everything rises or falls on the state of the family, Alex says
Well, you know, let's talk for just a moment about family because really everything rises or falls on the state of the family. And let's talk about the role that family plays in the trajectory of someone's life. it's just beyond measure, isn't it?
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: It's beyond measure. So even in my dissertation research, Alex, a lot of the results of those different things and all of the athletes that I was studying is recognizing that parental attachment or the family unit has a direct correlation, a significant direct correlation on whether or not kids will flourish not only in childhood and adolescence, but into their young adult years. Because a lot of time these attachment frameworks, if we go into attachment theory, Jon Bowlby, Mary Ainsworth, all of the research that they came up with that. This attachment framework is really developed by the age of 2 years old. Doesn't mean that it's cemented by the grace of God. We have this thing called neuroplasticity, where our brains can begin to grow and develop and be fluid and shape throughout time and more specifically through unique relationships. But as these things are more secured, they're over time. What I realized in my research is that, man, the family unit, like you said, is where things really do rise and fall. There's probably a big reason as to why Proverbs 22:6 says raise up a child, in a sense, in the way that they should walk, so that later on in life they would not depart from it. There's a reason why. It says, though, that even when your mother or father forsake you, that God never will. This idea of both, and that we need God, but we also need each other in this journey, in this fight, in the family. Alex, it matters more than people could ever ask, think, or even imagine.
>> Alex McFarland: you know, well, it does. And look, all of us, you know, there's this old joke that, you know, families are like brownies, mostly sweet with a few nuts. all of us have had, you know, hopefully some positive things. Maybe we've got some things we kind of wish we could move on beyond.
Zachary Clinton: Christians can be redeemed and changed through Jesus Christ
But let's talk about for the person listening and maybe their parental relationships, were not that pleasant. Maybe their family background has not been ideal. but not only in reality, there can be a new day, but especially as Christians. You know, one of my favorite verses, Dr. Clinton, is, Joel 2:25, where God says, I restore the years. The locust has eaten. That's kind of a farming illustration. Imagine locusts tear up your crop and eat all your crop. Well, you know, there's no hope till next year. No, God says, I can give you a do over. I can restore the years. The locust has eaten. So with that being said, Zach, speak to the person who needs the reminder that no matter what your past was, your present and future in Jesus Christ can be redeemed and changed.
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Most definitely can.
Zachary: Forgiving is not forgetting; it's surrendering
You know, I'm just thinking there's this phrase called estrangement that's running pretty rampant, especially in the mental health space, and I think rampant within the church, within the pews, that a lot of pastors maybe don't even realize. Alex. And I think the big problem is that a lot of times there's been some misguidance toward whether it's, no contact or whether it's toward not, not forgiving or this lack of reconciliation within the home. And one thing I want to just note up front is, as you mentioned, some kids, Alex, were not privileged with the opportunity of being raised in homes. Like I was. Like, I know that sometimes I'm an anomaly. And to be completely honest with you, there's a lot of people that I sit across from on a regular basis who are raised in a lot of discord, a lot of challenge, a lot of chaos within their family unit, and they don't have as strong or as meaningful relationships with their mom and, or dad or their siblings. There was a lot of hurt, There was a lot of wounds. There was abuse, there was neglect, There was countless things. There was trauma. Childhood adverse experiences are some of the things. Aces are things that we talk all the time. About 2/3 of all kids experience an adverse childhood experience or trauma by the age of 16 years old, one in four girls, one in six boys, are sexually abused by the age of 18 by someone they should have loved or trust within the home. You think about those stats for a moment. I mean, those are alarming. And so to a person that looks back at their past and says, man, Zach, you know, there's so much hurt, there's so much damage. There were so many wounds. Like, I don't want to take responsibility for the things that have happened to me. As you mentioned, though, by the blood that was shed on a cross at Calvary because of what Jesus has done for us. Redemption is possible because it was paid on your behalf. And I would say this forgiveness only takes one person. Forgiving is not forgetting. Forgiving is not saying or excusing the behavior of somebody else. It's not saying, oh, well, I'm just going to move on and act like it never happened. What forgiving is doing is it's really this act in this posture of surrender and giving this person, giving this relationship, giving the situation over to God and allowing him to do with it as he pleases because he is a God of restoration and he is the great repurposer who can take broken things and broken people and broken relationships and make them beautiful again. And so that's really what I would encourage somebody today who's experienced a lot of pain and a lot of wounds is surrender that relationship, surrender that thing over to God, choose to forgive. Reconciliation might not be possible. It might not even be healthy, to be completely honest with you, Alex. But I think that's a first step and that's a brand new start that can Help us create potentially a brand new ending.
>> Alex McFarland: Amen. Well said. Well said.
The CDC recently released a survey measuring teen mental health and suicide rates
Hey, let me cue something up. And I want you to tell us kind of where the CDC is on the psychological state of teens and young adults. But in our camps and our youth conferences, which we've done for many, many years, for apologetics, for example, you know, 20 years ago, young people would ask things like where did the Bible come from?
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: From?
>> Alex McFarland: How do we know the Bible is really true? And how do we know Jesus Christ really did rise from the dead? And all those questions are still important and we speak and write to those things. But honestly the questions now are, in my opinion, and we're in front of several thousand young people every year throughout all 50 states, the questions are less evidential and more emotional. For example, fear, and anxiety. You know, like when we'll do open Q and A, very, very often the questions are like, what does God say about the fear I feel? And there's like this debilitating anxiety and even almost like a dread. And if you ask, young people, you know, what exactly are you afraid of? They might say, I don't know, I just have this anxiety about life. rarely ever, almost never do I have kids say, gee, where did the manuscripts of the Bible come from? Or how do we know that Noah, built that ark? And I mean, we can answer those questions when they come, but it's much more emotive than cognitive. It's much more about, how am I feeling and can God help me so if you would speak to that. The anxiety that seems to be so prominent among young adults and teens these days.
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Well, I think it goes back to the conversation regarding technology and phones that things are literally at our kids fingertips. And it's not just in a sense, you allowing the world to be exposed to them, it's allowing your child to be exposed to the world. And that's where things like pornography and different things can begin to come into our child's lives. But when it comes to the fear and the anxiety of things, Alex, I mean, you're talking about, think about the conversations that are even running within Christian circles right now of UFOs and the church and the war in Iran and rash shootings happening everywhere. And a lot of people would say and argue, well, the world is a very different place post COVID 19 than what it was prior to COVID 19. So when you look at stats, you have to be more current and evidence based. In the last five or so years a lot of the research is showing that the rates of anxiety, the rates of depression, the rates of addiction, the rates of loneliness, the rates of suicidality rates, really places that we've never even seen before. And that's alarming. That is a staggering statistic when we're even just considering those things. But then, 2023, the CDC did a youth Risky behavior survey. And what really alarmed people is that this isn't just a small survey of one high school. This is a survey of over 20,103 participants, 20,103 United States High school students that they are studying and that they're giving this survey to assessing their, in a sense, mental and behavioral health as it rel to suicidality. And the stats were honestly heartbreaking. 19.6% of those students had recognized that they felt so persistently sad that they in a Sense, contemplated suicide. 16% of those students had actually made a suicide plan of how they were going to take and end their own life. And then 9.5% of those students had attempted suicide at least once in the 12 months prior to that 2023 youth risky behavior survey. So when you see those stats, when you recognize that SUIC is the second leading cause of death amongst ages 8 to about 20 years old, there is an alarm that should go off in our minds that says, oh my goodness, yes, this is the most hungry and curious for Christ's generation that's ever walked the face of the earth. Yes, people are flocking back to the church and that is a praise. But at the same time, this is the most anxious generation that has ever walked the face of the earth. And I am just a firm believer that it goes back to the distractions of our devices that we continually put in our kids hands. And the problem is that we are trying do relationship through technology rather than just simply through embodied friendship like it used to be. Even in my generation, I'm only 30, I know that I'm on the younger side of the millennial generation, but man, I remember like the slumber parties and I remember playing outside with my friends and I remember doing things that were so meaningful. I don't even remember really having a phone all that much. But that's a completely different world that our kids are now growing up in.
>> Alex McFarland: Ah, absolutely. You know, I was very blessed to grow up in, in rural North Carolina on a farm and, and my sister and I, and then all of the kids in the neighborhood, you know, basically, mom was like, hey, go play. Ah, don't kill yourself. And be back in time for supper. And, you know, we never rode a bike with a helmet. Listen, I'm not saying you should do that. I'm just saying how I grew up. But, our parents allowed us to, you know, get some, some bruises and scrapes and in a way I think it kind of made us stronger. we probably should have had a little fear. We didn't have any fear, you know, but, you know, what do you advise churches to do? How can, you know, pastors, youth pastors and adult volunteers minister to an anxious generation through their churches?
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: You know, I think it comes down to some Rs that we really do a lot in our educating and teaching space. Alex is being able to recognize, the different challenges that our kids are up against, recognize even the signs. A lot of times our youth, our adolescents, our young adults, they don't, they maybe haven't developed the language quite yet to help people understand that they are struggling. So being able to recognize things, whether it's physically so, whether it's a disheveled appearance, whether it's changes in appetite, changes in sleep, whether it's significant weight fluctuation, whether it's just seeing the lack of depth in their responses when you're asking them how they're doing and they just give you the one word answers, fine, good. those types of things, being able to dive a little bit deeper and continually show up while at the same time responding to them in a more effective and efficient manner. So how do we respond more appropriately or empathetic and recognize maybe.
>> Alex McFarland: Forgive me, forgive me. We gotta pull away Quickly, quickly.
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Give your website ZachClinton.com AACC.net when dad
>> Jeff King: passed away, in 07, he left an inheritance and they had saved and saved through the years. Was just wondering what I could do with that money invested or whatever. I knew that I would like to help the Lord somehow in his work. And then I kept hearing about the charitable gift annuity and I thought, well, that really sounds good. And I knew that AFR would just be the best because they're in my home all day, all day long. And I kind of wanted to partner with the Lord through AFR and AFA and give back. And I just felt like I knew that's what I wanted to do. Like I say, it's just so easy. I would just highly recommend the foundation.
>> Ed Vitagliano: The Hamilton quarter podcast and one minute commentaries are available at afr.net back to the Hamilton Corner on American Family Radio.
Alex McFarland speaks with Dr. Zachary Zach Clinton about youth mental health issues
>> Alex McFarland: Welcome back to the program, Alex. McFarland sitting in for attorney pastor broadcaster Abe Hamilton III. By the way, if you recognize, my voice, it might be because of a show called Exploring the Word, now in its 16th year, we're on the American Family Radio Network live Monday through Friday and, prerecorded at other places all around. Wherever you get, your digital content or maybe, maybe you are like the 93% of Americans that still listen to terrestrial radio. Yes, radio is out there. You can find all of our content [email protected], you can listen to this show again, maybe forward a link to somebody that may be blessed to hear this. Afr.net and of course alexmcfarland.com before the break, we, were hearing from our guest, Dr. Zachary Zach Clinton. And, you were giving some Rs. I had asked about what churches and leaders, could do and you, you said recognize and respond. if you would, Zach, cue that up again. And I want to give you time to finish that thought because this is good stuff.
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Yes, Alex. So the first step is to be able to recognize the challenges, the different things, the many complexities that our kids are up against, but also be able to recognize when they're struggling. Because a lot of our kids, our youth or adolescents, they maybe don't have the language, let somebody know the challenges that they're up against. So looking at the physical or the behavioral things, whether it's weight fluctuation, whether it's changes in appetite and sleep, whether it's the lack of depth in their responses, whether it's emotional fluctuation where it's just like, you know, one day they're this person and the next day there's someone completely different. Being able to recognize those challenges is really important. Being able to respond then effectively and efficiently, and I'll say this empathetically, the language in the mental health space has changed away from what's the matter with that kid or what's wrong with him or her into maybe what happened to this child. So getting to know the story and the struggle beneath the story even really begins to matter. So asking those open ended questions, that helps you then, number three, relate to kids in times of need. So that way we're able to have more meaningful conversations. You're not just constantly giving them advice or being a dictator, but you're also not just being an active listener, allowing this kid, in a sense to walk to the inevitable death of a cliff. You're actually beginning to guide them through life, through meaningful interaction. And the last one is learning how and when to refer. A lot of times churches will sometimes just try to battle, through with the child who maybe there are continued, mental health challenges. There's continued things in severity levels and it's, there needs to be a time and a space we're able to say, hey, maybe this is a little bit over my pay grade. Maybe I need to bring somebody else in. Even as a licensed professional counselor, I am always referring out to whether it's psychologist and psychiatrist and pastoral care because I believe that this sense of holistic care and the humility to lock arms with other people is only going to be to provide the help and the hope and the healing that people not only desire, but I just believe, Alex, that they're very deserving of. And so being able to give those four hours, recognize, respond, relate, refer, those are how a lot of our educational platforms and programs have been built over the years.
>> Alex McFarland: Indeed, indeed. And you know, what a joy. What, what a joy. The Bible says that we are his ministers. If you're a born again believer. And, and I'm not just talking like a pastor, thank God for, for the godly ministers, but every Christian is really an ambassador of the love of Jesus to a world that is hurting and hungry. And so, you know, Zach, I gotta tell you, in the ministry, even when I was at Liberty University, I was going simultaneously to seminary and the grad school. And I found myself doing a lot of hospital visits and I noticed something. I want you to comment on this, if you would. performed my first funeral while I was in seminary at Liberty. When somebody is in the hospital, all that matters is God and family. I mean, and in 30 years I've been at the bedside of right, many dying people. Nobody ever on their deathbed says, oh, I should have had a nicer car. All that matters is the Lord and my loved ones. Loved ones speak to that. And you know, I think millions m of people would concur. Certainly everyone who's ever been in the ministry, you know, in the crucible of life with people, all that matters at the bottom of the page is God and family. Wouldn't you agree?
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Absolutely. I think when I've sat with people on their deathbeds, I've done a lot of life with people and we've had a lot of ups and a lot of downs, but just continuing to show up for them. And I've never heard anybody ask for another dime. I've always asked, heard them ask for a lot more time. I've never Heard somebody ask for a lot more money. they just want to reflect on the memories. They just wish that maybe they would have gone back and done things a little bit differently, spent more time, reached out a little bit more frequently, made the call, gotten home a little bit more, whatever it was. Because as you mentioned, it's about a relationship with God, and it's about a relationship with those closest to us. Whether it's chosen or unchosen family, it's the recognition that we were made to be in relationship with one another. And I think the call that I have to a lot of families out there, Alex, is this idea. Ian Simpkins is a pastor out of Tennessee, and he's currently working on a book that's titled Every Table in Altar. And the research that he has revealed shows that 60 years ago, the average American family spent around 90 minutes a day around a table. Whether it was playing games, whether it was for conversation, whether it was sharing a meal together, whatever it was, but they spent time with one another. Embodied relationships. Fast forward 60 years later to today, the average American family spends less than 12 minutes around the time table. Again, they're always in their rooms, they're always doing something else, but they're not together. And that's the recognition. And you talk about phones. I, I speak a lot into marriages. marriages on average, spend less than 12 minutes in meaningful conversation with your spouse a day, but more than four hours on your devices a day. Four hours connected to a screen, but disconnected from each other. It's this recognition that we need to learn how to pray together, how to play together, and how to share a plate together. So learning how to spend time, time modeling what faith looks like within the home. Spend time in prayer, pray with each other. Pray, of course, intimately with God alone, but at the same time, make it a communal thing with your family. Number two, learn how to play together. Spend some special time, do meaningful things where, again, you're not forcing things, especially on your kids, but you're spending time in meaningful conversation and engagement with them. And lastly, share a plate together, eat together, laugh together, have fun, and get to know. Know the intricacies of your family, of your child, of your spouse that maybe you couldn't otherwise. That's just a challenge that I would give to a lot of families out there today.
>> Alex McFarland: God bless you. This is such wise counsel, folks. I want to encourage you to listen to this again. Re. Listen, I'm sitting here taking notes, just, rejoicing at all this, this great solid truth you're giving and I. I want to listen to your words again, Dr. Clinton, but I want to change gears with the time we've got left. I'm thrilled that we can, you know, begin to touch on this subject.
You've got a book coming out called Forged about biblical masculinity
You've got a book coming out called Forged, and it's about biblical masculinity. and I want us to talk about this. The title is Forged, the Biblical Meaning of Masculinity. Zach, in pop media, you know, like in sitcoms or even movies, you know, if there is a dad in the home, very often he's like kind of a goofball or something like that, or maybe just this, you know, stern autocratic leader. And, you know, much has been written about 50 years of the feminist movement really kind of marginalizing men. And, you know, maleness and masculinity is said to be toxic. One thing that concerns me is I've been reading about the manosphere. The pendulum has swung the other way, where, you know, there are guys that are kind of a caricature of what a man should be, you know, sexually promiscuous, a player, you know, very demeaning and disrespectful to women. let's talk about God's initial intent for masculinity and how we can recover over, you know, godly manhood in this generation that's kind of, you know, lost its way on this topic.
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Let's start out the end of our conversation by saying this is one of my favorite things. Just because, as you mentioned, culture and society would say that masculinity is toxic. Men are buffoons, they're a joke, they're horrible husbands, terrible fathers, porn addicts, abusers, all of these things. But in reality, I'll say this as a mental health professional. There's a lot of toxic behavior. Behavior. I've seen men make a lot of toxic choices, but there's nothing toxic about being a man. So what does biblical masculinity actually look like that's at, ah, the premise of this book, Forged. It's this recognition that I believe it's built on different pillars. And I believe that biblical masculinity is kind of broken down into five different things. It's this idea of being a prophet, a priest, a pursuer, a provider, and a protector. Let's start there. A, ah, provider is this recognition. It's not just providing for the home financially or fiscally. It's this idea of being able to provide emotionally for our kids, being able to meet them in time of need. Number two, being A protector. Not just being a protector of the person, in the alley, but, the. I should say the thief trying to steal the person in the alley, but really being a protector of the thief that's trying to steal the purpose within your child's, or maybe your spouse's mind. It's this recognition of how can I begin to protect this innocent, beautiful little child or this innocent, beautiful wife of mine to be able to recognize. I want to protect their minds, I want to protect their hearts. I want to protect their souls. I want to protect their spirit. Spirits, as, scripture says in Ephesians 6, not provoking these things, but instructing them in wise counsel, then it's a pursuer. Right? I think complacency is one of the greatest culprits within the home. And we get so comfortable that we just sit back and we stop pursuing the things and the people that God has placed right in front of us. So never stop pursuing those things in a meaningful way. Then be a prophet. Understand that words create worlds. What are the words that you are bringing into your home every single day? Are you speaking life into the lives of those who mean the most to you? And lastly, are you a priest? Are you somebody who. In Ephesians 5, when God talks about this idea of biblical submission, I think a lot of husbands take that out of context. Alex. I have always been able to read the commentaries and different theological beliefs of the recognition that when a man is leading accurately or leading appropriately in Scripture, they are fully surrendered and submitted to God first and foremost. So therefore, their wife and their children are not really following Alex. They're not really following Zach. They're not really following Brian or Jeff. They are following God through us. And then our spouses and our children get to be a recipient of the love that hopefully oozes out of our spirit every single day. I challenge men with this. Jesus might not come to your front door and knock on your home and walk in to be able to exude himself to you, but he has sent you as a messenger each and every day. And my prayer for every man, every husband, every father out there listening today is that they would be an example and they would be a testament of what Christlike obedience, faithfulness, and love looks like within their homes each and every day.
>> Alex McFarland: Amen. Amen. You know, the longer I live and, you know, 30 years ago, I did believe this, but the longer I've lived and not only been married to Angie now for, you know, over 35 years, and we've seen, God do So many things to guide us, provide for us. But, Zach, I, more than ever, to the core of my soul. Soul believe in the sacredness of the family. And I tell guys, hey, I said, the young men in all of our events, look, the second greatest gift God will ever give you, second only to salvation itself. The second greatest gift is a Christian wife. And, you lay down your life for your bride like Christ laid down his life for his bride. The church. Church. you know, we're living in a time of worldview battles. But I'll say this, and you agree or disagree to honor God, live a blessed life and contribute to the fulfillment of the Great Commission. Become a champion for family, beginning in your own home. I love apologetics. I love theology and evangelism. The key to saving America and evangelizing the world is the family. I really believe that.
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: Absolutely. I was officiating a wedding this past weekend. Alex and I was challenging the bride and the groom with this thought as they walked down the aisle. And they came, in a sense, presenting themselves before the Lord. They were making vows to God first and foremost. And again, the spouse gets to be the recipient of those vows. But they're not just saying these empty promises that can be blown away by the wind to one another. These are vows before God. Vows to be faithful to one another in sickness and in health, till death do us part. Like, these are the words that we cling to and we listen to in all the movies and so many things. But it's this idea that when we recognize that the family really matters more than anything else. And really, a wedding day is not just a day of celebration. It's a day of crucifixion. It's being able to say, I am dying to myself. I am dying to the things that need to be dead in me already. I am dying to whatever it is that might actually create this sense of strength away from the family unit or for my faithfulness to God ultimately altogether. And I am choosing to lay down my life for one another as unto the Lord and not unto man. And that which God has brought together, we hope and pray that he and the world would never separate. That's a beautiful thing when we recognize the heart and the meaning behind marriage and the family.
Zach Clinton's book focuses on the ABCs of biblical masculinity
>> Alex McFarland: Zach Clinton, your book forged the biblical meaning of masculinity. When does it release and where may people.
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: People get it so they can actually get it wherever books are sold right now. forge, it's a 90 day devotional. It's the ABCs of biblical masculinity so 90 characteristics that will help us and give us challenges as men to continue to live this life forged in the fire. Recognizing that maybe in the midst of your suffering moments and your trials and tribulations, God has not forgotten you. He's just forming you. He's not punishing you. He's just pruning you and preparing you for all that he has has left for you to accomplish and to experience on this side of eternity.
>> Alex McFarland: God bless you Dr. Zach Clinton and the great work you're doing. Give our regards to your father Tim Clinton and all of your family and staff. Folks, you can listen to this program [email protected] in the meantime, remember the challenge that everything rises or falls on the state of the family and you can begin to maximize on this gift of family today. God bless you all. Thanks Watching for for listening the views
>> Dr. Zachary Clinton: and opinions expressed in this broadcast may not necessarily reflect those of the American Family association or American Family Radio.