American Family Radio thanks sponsor Preborn for supporting pro life advocacy

Dr. Jessica Peck: We would like to take a moment to thank our sponsor, PreBorn. When a mother meets her baby on ultrasound and hears their heartbeat, it's a divine connection. And the majority of the time she will choose life. But they can't do it without our help. Preborn needs us, the pro life community, to come alongside them. One ultrasound is just $28. To donate, dial pound 250 and say the keyword BABY or visit preborn.com/AFR hello

 : and welcome to the Dr. Nurse Mama show prescribing hope for healthy families here on American Family Radio. Here's your host, professor, pediatric nurse practitioner, and mom of four, Dr. Jessica Peck.

Dr. Jessica Peck: Well, hey there, friends, and welcome to my favorite time of day and my favorite day of the week, y'.

Dr. Jessica Peck: All.

Dr. Jessica Peck: It's Friday. We have made it to the end of the week and we are already in the month of May. I cannot not believe that before I jump into today's show, want to remind you about something that's happening in July and that's going to be here before you know it. We're talking about the Activate Summit. This is happening July 16th through 18th in Tupelo. You can go to afa.netsummit and right now you can use the code 50 off. That's 50 off off. Then you can get $50 off of registration. I'll be one of the keynote speakers. There was real. I'm really happy to be on Abe Hamilton's show. I'm going to step into the corner, y'. All PR for me, that is an intimidating place to be and was ha. I've been happy to talk with so many of the other great speakers. Talked earlier in the week with Bert Harper, who will be there. And we would love to have you join us. And I'm grateful for the opportunity to be able to be there and to equip families, to really encourage them, with all of the hope that I have received.

We are wrapping up eight Weeks of communication with a focus on gratitude

And that brings us to today's dose of hope, which is all about gratitude. Now, listen, if you are just joining in, we are in a series called 52 Habits for Healthy Families. Every Friday, I talk about a different habit. We started in January. We did four core spiritual disciplines. Then we talked about six rhythms. We are now wrapping up the communication series, eight Weeks of communication. We have been talking about different communication skills that are just so critical for the health of your family. And I don't know about you, but I find this to be one of the most convicting sections because just, just out of the, out of the heart, the mouth speaks and what is in our heart is what overflows. And so often we say things that we regret. And so if you want to go back and listen to those. We talked about listening with your face, words of affirmation, apologizing sincerely, writing letters, modeling your faith. And last week, we talked about not reacting, but responding instead and naming and claiming your emotions. And heard from a lot of you that that was just as convicting for you as it was for me. And I'm grateful for that. So as we wrap up our communication section here and we start moving into the next section, we're going to be spending this summer talking about technology every Friday. We're going to spend a long time there. But today is probably one of the most powerful communication skills that we can bring to our home. It's simple, but it is not easy. It is so underrated. It is so underused and underappreciated, but it has the power to transform your heart, your. Your home and your family. I'm talking about speaking gratitude, having an attitude of gratitude and reclaiming a heart of thankfulness in an age that is just so entitled. I know some of you are like, oh, Jessica, I'm getting on my soapbox right now. I will jump on it with you. I will talk about this generation. So hold your horses. We're going to get there.

Creating a culture of gratitude is hard because we live in one of materially blessed generations in history

But let's talk about how we can really reclaim our hearts and our homes and our families and create a culture of gratitude is hard because we really live in one of the most materially blessed generations in history. And, you know, my grandparents, I lived with them for a long time while I was going through nursing school. And my. I remember my grandfather, one day he. I went into his bathroom and he had just like maybe about an inch of water in the tub. And I touched the water and it was tepid. It was room temperature. And I thought, man, the. The drain must just not have, you know, it must not have caught, and it just didn't go down all the way. So I checked the drain and it work and let the bathwater out. A couple. Couple hours later, my pawpaw comes and says, who let out my bath water? And I was like, oh, that was me. And he just didn't want to waste anything. You know, he could reuse bath water twice. That's how he grew up, and that is how he just stewarded what he had. But today, we have anything at our fingertips. At the same time, though, anxiety, dissatisfaction, outrage, loneliness continue to rise. We have more convenience than ever before, but way less contentment. Amazon is constantly telling us we need something else. We have more connection digitally, but often less appreciation between people from person to person. Now, there was once a time when please and thank you were considered basic markers of character. Gratitude was expected. Kids were taught. My granny taught me, write a thank you, thank you note. Like, actually get pen and paper and write it. And families paused before meals to give thanks. And communities understood that appreciation strengthened relationships and cultivated humility. But culturally, we have seen a really big shift. And I'm going to take a deep dive into this. So take a deep breath, and here we go. We have moved from gratitude to expectation, from appreciation to entitlement. Instead of being amazed by what we have grateful for it, we are more often irritated by what we lack, by what we don't have. I mean, just think about your daily life. If you had somebody walking around following you with a camera and a little counter, I bet you would have more complaints than you would have, like, oh, I'm so grateful that I have this. It's just, why don't I have this? Why isn't this here yet? Why is this shipment late? Why is this technology not working? And I am talking to myself because this has been my whole day today. It's actually been my whole week. Social media trains us to compare constantly. Advertising convinces us, treat yourself, you deserve it. Algorithms feed dissatisfaction, and every ordinary inconvenience just feels intolerable, like, we cannot even wait a moment. And now, in an age of artificial intelligence, we're facing these strange new cultural questions, like, should we say thank you to a robot, to an AI chatbot? And now, some people mock it when you have gratitude, when you say thank you, when you express sincere thanks, they're like, okay, that. That's, There's just a discomfort, a palpable discomfort with it. And others insist on it and say, like, you have to do it. Like, I feel like we're losing it. And I will insist that you do it. But the deeper issue is this. What happens to the human heart when gratitude disappears from our vocabulary altogether, from our heart and mind? And the impact is a lot more impactful than you think. Now, let's look back a few generations ago and see how the world has shifted. Now, many of you who grew up, if you were greatest generation, if you're baby boomers, you probably shared a room with a sibling. Your meals almost never came out. it came from out to eat. I know. My husband and I were talking about this, and he said, yeah, if you go to Pizza Hut, don't you think you're getting that red glass, you're getting the white glass of the water. You don't get to get a fountain drink. Luxuries were very occasional, toys were a lot fewer, clothing was handed down and that was just normal. Entertainment was very limited and waiting was just a normal part of growing up and a normal part of life. So because of that, children in these generations, we developed patience and appreciation and we appreciated what we have and we were a little more resilient and we were aware of sacrifice. Today's kids are fight. We, we complain about them being so ungrateful, but we're also saturating them with instant streaming, instant delivery, instant answers, personalized entertainment, not just what's on tv. They're not stuck with the price. That's right. If they're homesick from school, they can binge watch a, whole entire series if they want to. They don't have to wait for the next sec session to come out, the next season to come out. They don't have to wait for the commercials. There are unlimited options and there's rapid replacement of broken or outdated items. We don't fix anything, you just throw it away. So this cultural shift means that past generations learned be thankful for what you have. And modern culture is saying you deserve more. And we can see how this impacts our attitude of gratitude because gratitude used to be reinforced collectively. Children were taught in school, say thank you, respect your elders. We honor sacrifice of our military men and women. We appreciate what teachers do, we're respectful to them, we help neighbors, we contribute to the family. You take out the trash and you clean up. And that gratitude was reinforced socially by churches and schools and grandparents and neighbors and community traditions. Now let's look at modern messaging and it's all about, hey, you speak your truth, you, nobody can tell you what to say, nobody can tell you how to feel. It's all about your self fulfillment, your self focus, your personal comfort, your emotions being comfortable, your individual rights. And children start asking what am I owed? Instead of what have I been given? And that's when we see kids saying, you know, this wasn't fair, I didn't get this, I didn't get that. And a, self centered culture naturally struggles with gratitude because gratitude requires humility. Now if you were from a generation that you were alive when John F. Kennedy said this very famous quote in his 1961 inaugural address, it's so famous, it's still repeated a lot in popular culture. And he said this, he said, ask not what your country can do for you ask what you can do for your country. And that resonated so deeply because it challenged Americans towards sacrifice and responsibility and shared purpose during this very pivotal cultural moment. And America at that time was entering the height of the Cold War. People felt a strong sense that democracy and freedom and national identity, they needed protection and participation. And earlier generations had lived through the Great Depression in World War II, and they that resonated with them. It cultivated a culture of duty and sacrifice and collective responsibility. And Kennedy, when he made that statement, he was confronting directly, even at that time, growing consumerism and self interest by shifting the focus from entitlement to contribution. And the really what it why it appealed so much, I think is because ultimately people want meaning and purpose bigger than themselves. Now the good news is God has given us this purpose. God has dreamed up a life for us far more than we could ever ask or imagine. But all of a sudden we have this culture that we put the burden of creating that what do I have? What do I deserve? I have to get it on my own power into kids. And that is what's generating and driving current advertising. Advertising today depends on your dissatisfaction to be successful. That's not a great place to be. Because modern M marketing most strategies are going to constantly communicate things to you like, hey, your life is incomplete, your happiness is missing something, you need an upgrade. Newer is better. Enough is never enough. You need this, you need more. Treat yourself. And children absorb these messages and daily through YouTube, YouTube, through social media, through influencers, through gaming cultures, anywhere they're getting targeted advertising or peer comparison. And now these, this generation today, they are comparing themselves constantly because they see everyone's life highlights on social media. They see the best of everybody's life, not that occasional treat. They're seeing that this is a lifestyle of vacations and birthday parties and designer homes and new designer clothes and popularity and being adored and beauty standards and achievements all day long. And the emotional result of that is not, it is not gratitude, it's envy, it's insecurity, it's loneliness, it's dissatisfaction, it's fomo, which is called fear of missing out. You know, this is so prevalent in, in child culture and pediatric culture today that we actually have a validated scientific scale that we can measure FOMO and the impact that it is happen, happening, having on kids. And then we have kids who just can't enjoy ordinary blessings. Having a meal together with family, taking a walk at the sunset. It's always gotta be something more. And comparison is training the heart to overlook the things you have and constantly yearn for the things that you want.

We have normalized complaining on social media, which disheartens me

The other thing that's happened in this culture that really disheartens me is that we have normalized complaining. Complaining is a cultural language. Now consider how modern culture rewards it. Sarcasm, outrage, criticism, mockery, negativity. Those are the comments that are uplifted on social media, upvoted, who that get the most attention. And online engagement thrives on emotions like anger and conflict and controversy and public dissatisfaction and every sort of negative emotion you can imagine. Now children, observe, absorb emotional tone before they start to absorb values. And so when we normalize this tone of complaining as a primary way that people connect, they vent, they entertain, they gain attention. When what once was considered poor character honestly is now framed as humor or authenticity or social bonding. And it's really concerning to me because you think about it, you know, people used to complain when you'd say, hey, how are you doing? And people say, I'm fine, how are you? I'm fine. And they'd say, oh, that's not really real. Now what do people say? Oh, I'm awful, I'm tired, I'm exhausted. People are terrible. Traffic is ridiculous. I can't deal with this. I just, living the dream. Just all of this sarcasm, that's a casual conversation. And social media has taught us to value it and amplify it. Humor is built around cynicism and mockery and imitation, not encouragement. That is definitely not there. And so now people are bonding through sharing their dissatisfaction. Whether that's complaining about parenting, criticizing your spouses, mocking your co workers, venting about your customers, attacking opposing viewpoints online, just that is monetized and valued. And it's taking our hearts away from gratitude. Well, listen, I got a few more things to say up here on my soapbox. I hope that you will join me after the break. We'll see you in just a second.

Preborn empowers women to become mothers through an ultrasound

Mother's Day. It's one of the most beautiful moments of the year to share life changing news. Maybe you've seen it. A family gathered around the table. When someone stands up and says, next year there will be a brand new mom in our family, there's nothing like it. But for some women, Mother's Day feels very different. Instead of celebrating, they're carrying a secret. Afraid, unsure, alone. That's why preborn exists. Because when a woman sees her baby on an ultrasound and hears that tiny heartbeat, it doubles the chance she'll choose life. I couldn't imagine my life without him because of them. He's here. We're gonna get through it and it's gonna be okay. Preborn empowers women to become mothers. Just $28 provides one ultrasound. To donate, dial pound 250 and say the keyword baby. That's pound 250, baby. Or donate [email protected]/AFR, that's preborn.com/AFR.

Gratitude by Brandon Lake: so I throw up my hands and praise you again? Cause all that I have is a hallelujah? Hallelujah. I know it's not much But I have nothing else fit for a King M Except for heart singing Hallelujah

Dr. Jessica Peck: Welcome back. friends, that is Gratitude by Brandon Lake. And that's exactly what we're talking about today. We are talking about the healthy habit of gratitude. It's almost like my team planned that they did because I have the best team in the whole world here at American Family Radio and so grateful to everybody who contributes to be able to. To get us on the radio and to be able to prescribe hope for healthy families. We are talking about gratitude. I'm right in the middle of it. And really talking about this as a communication essential for your family. Now. I've been talking about how culture has changed and how we have become a less and less grateful people. Complaining is so normalized. And when we see entertainment and media and they reinforce this posture of outrage, constant dissatisfaction, and we train people to focus on what's wrong rather than what is good. And even minor inconveniences now just trigger disproportionate frustration. Have you been there? I have been there. Where I think I should not be this upset about this tiny little thing. I mean, just having to wait a long time in the drive through or whatever it is, if we're delayed, if we're waiting, we're bored. We're just discomforted in any way, we are inconvenienced in any way. These are just intolerable. In a culture that is accustomed to immediacy and chronic complaining becomes emotionally contagious within families. Children absorb the emotional tone of negativity from adults and they start to mirror that irritation, negativity, sarcasm, and entitlement in their own speech. So if your child is doing that at home most of the time, time, it's such a hard truth. I've lived this in my own life. You have to pull up a mirror to yourself and think they've learned that from somewhere and they may have be learning it from you and you don't even realize it. And the danger is really not honest struggle. We have those healthy lament absolutely Those are deeply biblical human experiences. But the danger is when complaining is the auto default posture of your heart. And if you have habitual complaining, that's going to magnify anxiety, fuel discontentment, weaken your resilience, damage your relationships, and crowd out gratitude. Now, an attitude of gratitude doesn't ignore hardship, but it refuses to let negativity become the loudest voice in the home. You know, I'm reminded of a Bible story from the book of Mark about a religious, leader named Jairus who came to ask Jesus to heal his daughter. And Jesus said he would come, and he was delayed on the way to help the woman who had been bleeding. And I can't imagine, imagine how Jairus felt. You know, just standing there on the side thinking, wait, you said you were going to help me. And now we wait. And then he gets news that his daughter has died and they get to the house and all the mourners are outside wailing. And do you know what Jesus does? He dismisses them. He says, you can go on now. And he only took a little group in with him. And I think that's so convicting, to me, to think about dismissing the negative voices in my life, who is that who is always speaking negativity over you, who is always complaining about everything? We have got to just dismiss that voice as much as we can and when, and we can accidentally let that leech over and build a culture of complaining in our own homes. Now, how does this work? Well, we're sitting around the dinner table and all we're talking about is how stressed we are, how tough work is, how awful the people are in our lives. Our teachers, our bosses, the person who was, you know, handing us food at the grocery store. Just frustration over any little inconvenience or focusing on only what's wrong. And we're subtly teaching our kids that dissatisfaction is just a way of life and that gratitude is something rare, that's rarely deserved. And complaining is just kind of an automatic default. And that emotional atmosphere in your home is discipling your children just as much as your words are now. We're also competing against technology because technology has changed our expectations. Convenience has reduced wonder. We don't find many things wonderful anymore because we expect now instant responses. No longer do you have to wait for someone to come home and check their answering machine tape. If they're out, they're out. No, now I want an instant response. I want immediate entertainment. If I see that buffering circle, I'm going to be so frustrated. We want constant accessibility to Anything and everything. We expect stores to be open 247 fast shipping, and I don't want to pay for it, by the way. Customized experiences and these ordinary blessings of life just no longer feel extraordinary. Like, why would we give thanks for something like clean water, clean air, air conditioning? If you live in the south, we can be really grateful for those things. And a child with access to thousands of movies. Do you know what they say? Do you know, you know what they say? Because if you have kids in your home, you know what they say? If you tell them watch something, they'll say there's nothing to watch. Even though they have access to billions of hours of streaming. Abundance without gratitude creates boredom instead of joy. And that's something that we really need to think about. We overexpose our kids to abundance. And so they don't. They don't value being gratitude, being grateful. And now we even have this weird thing where we think, should we say thank you to AI? Like, if you're chatting with a chatbot, do you say AI? Now some say, it's just a machine. You shouldn't, you shouldn't humanize it. But others intentionally say, well, if we're programming AI, we should program it to be polite at least. But this matters because gratitude is shaping the character of the speaker. And even small habits of appreciation form the posture of the heart. So when gratitude disappears from everyday speech, when it is not a normal part of your everyday family life, then something else is being lost. The other character traits that start to fall off are humility and gentleness and self awareness and awareness of the needs of others. So we have got to intentionally build what culture is trying to dismantle. At the same time, gratitude M is no longer built into the fabric of our culture. It's just not. We've got to practice it intentionally. So there are some practical ways that you can do this to slow down enough to notice the blessings it requires. Awareness. Children cannot appreciate what they're rushing past as we're living at the speed of a smartphone. So any place that you can slow down slower family meals, having a device, free conversation, walking in nature, just being intentional about reflecting on your day, Sabbath rhythms, all of these things. Hurry. Is suffocating the gratitude out of our lives. We just don't even have time for it. We've also got to teach our children to notice the invisible, work around them, help them recognize that, hey, meals don't magically appear like there's somebody making that for you. Homes don't get magically cleaned. Someone is cleaning that Up.

One simple way to practice gratitude is to ask your family who helped to make your life better today?

Someone is paying your bills. Your teacher is preparing your lessons. Healthcare workers are preparing for you even before you know you need them. Grandparents are praying for you and carrying wisdom and history. And we need to recognize these little things to be grateful for. So one question that you can ask your family. This is a very, like I said, simple, simple, simple way to practice gratitude. One question that you could ask your kids or your spouse before you go to bed, ask, who helped make your life better today? Who helped you today? Who were the helpers? That's probably the Gen X in me coming and, thinking of, Mr. Fred Rogers, who said, look for the helpers. You'll always find people who are helping. And that is really, really encouraging. When you see things that are just going so wrong, when you look around and see that we can be grateful for what seems so small. We also need to create a home where gratitude is spoken. Often saying things like, hey, thank you for helping me with the dishes. Thank you so much for picking up your shoes out of the, the front door. I appreciate your effort. That was really thoughtful. I'm so grateful for you. I'm so grateful for the way that you used your gifts to serve our family today. Children repeat what they repeatedly hear. So if you want your kids to be more grateful, you've got to fill up their gratitude tank so that it can overflow and that they will mimic what they see. And so it may feel, unnatural, when you first start doing it, but that's the way that we do it. Because the way that we try right now to rate, replace entitlement is by lecturing. You're so ungrateful. In my day, I had to walk uphill both ways to school. you know, all these things that we say we had to do, you just don't know how good you have it. And the question that I would ask is, how well is that working for you? Is that really creating gratitude in your home? It doesn't. It feels good for the moment, but it doesn't. And so we've got to replace entitlement by making our kids contribute. Yes, they have a lot of pressures and a lot of things that they have to do today, but they still need to help cook, they need to help clean, they need to serve their siblings, they need chores. They need to contribute to family life because contribution creates ownership and ownership increases appreciation. And that gives you a heart of gratitude. We, we need to teach contentment alongside ambition. Children should know it's okay to pursue their goals without believing, you know, happiness always exists. It's always going to end up well for them. We can be grateful for what we have while still growing towards what's next. But probably one of the hardest times to model gratitude is during hardship, when things are going wrong, when there's illness, when there's financial strain, when there's disappointment, when there's stress. Automatic gratitude. It's not a denial of pain. It's the recognition of God's presence in the middle of that pain. So if you want a home that is marked by gratitude, imagine if you had a home where appreciation was spoken freely between husband and wife, between spouses, between grandparent and grandchild, between your children. I mean, let's just shoot for the moon, why don't we? Where appreciation is spoken freely, where complaining is challenged gently. When somebody complains, saying, yeah, what do you have to be grateful for, too? What went well today? Where kindness is noticed, where service is normal, we're having enough, is celebrated, where the little pleasures in life are appreciated, where praying family prayer time includes prayers of thanksgiving, children learn that joy is not dependent on excess, abundance, having every need met. So culture may be drifting toward entitlement and comparison and dissatisfaction, but families still do have the power today to create homes that are rooted in gratitude and humility and peace and joy. Because gratitude is never just about manners. Gratitude shapes our soul. And Scripture teaches us that thankfulness is not optional for believers. It's not just a good idea. It is foundational to spiritual health. It is a command. In The Bible, in 1st Thessalonians 5:18, it says, Give thanks in all circumstances, in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. Now, notice carefully, it doesn't say, give thanks for everything. You may not be thankful for a cancer diagnosis, for the loss of a loved one, for financial burden, but you can be thankful in that and know that God is with you even in that hardship. We do not thank God for evil. We don't thank God for suffering or abuse or tragedy or loss. But even in hardship, we can be thankful for God's presence, for his provision, for his faithfulness, for his hope. And gratitude becomes an anchor in our suffering, not a denial of it. And so let's talk a little bit about, before we finish, how gratitude impacts our heart, our mind, our body, and our spirit. Because it's, as I said, it's far more than politeness. It is an act of worship. And throughout the Bible, thanksgiving is connected to joy, peace, humility, remembrance, obedience, trust in God's character. An ungrateful heart is self Focused and a grateful heart is God aware. Now, one of my favorite scriptures comes from Philippians 4, 6 through 7. And it says, do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. And when I started reading this for me as a nurse practitioner, I realized it's not, talking about your proverbial heart. You know, the one that you draw on a page, like how you feel this impacts your literal blood pressure, your risk for heart attack, your risk for stroke, your actual literal heart health. God has given us such wisdom in his Word. And Paul links gratitude to peace, not the answered prayer, not the improved circumstance, not the miraculous intervention. It is through thanksgiving. And gratitude interrupts anxiety because it shifts our focus from fear to faithfulness. So we can be grateful and we can be reminded that every good gift ultimately comes from the Father of Lights, that gratitude is the antidote for entitlement, that complaining magnifies the problem, but gratitude magnifies God's provision. Gratitude trains us to notice grace in our lives. The enemy of gratitude is comparison. And that chronic dissatisfaction quickly becomes a spiritual condition. So when we think about all of these, all of these things, how gratitude changes our hearts and minds, I mean, modern medicine and psychology are really confirming what Scripture taught us years ago. This is not just emotional, it's physiological. You sleep better, you, your immune system is better, your stress hormones are better. Chronic stress and bitterness places enormous strain on your heart, and gratitude calms your nervous system. And when you go to therapy, a lot of therapists, what the first thing that they'll do is tell you to start a gratitude journal. Just reframing exercises, just continually train yourself to gratitude and so you can do that. Gratitude is, is contagious. So is entitlement. And children are going to absorb the emotional culture in your home. So you can constantly complain or you can practice gratitude. Speak it out loud. Create a rhythm where you speak gratitude at dinner. You have a high low. And, buffalo. A buffalo is just something funny that happened in that day. A family gratitude journal. Keep a journal together. Just. It doesn't even have to be every day. It can be every once in a while where you write down what you're grateful for. Just model gratitude, where you're feeling stressful, rest not. And that's not pretending everything is fine. It's not weakness. This is spiritual strength. It takes no maturity to complain, but it takes wisdom and humility and perspective and faith to remain thankful in difficult circumstances. And perhaps one of the most healing phrases you can recover today and reclaim for your home is thank you. That perspective can change the entire posture of the heart, the culture of your home, and the trajectory of your family. That is really powerful stuff. Hey, when we come back, I'm going to have a special message of gratitude on Mother's Day. We'll be right back after this break.

 : Without even seeing them, show up, I could feel like the darkness. Jamie Sanchez is another Christian business proprietor who has been targeted for his faith. His Drip Cafe was opened to serve and help the homeless of downtown Denver. We believe sex outside of marriage and homosexuality is a sin in God's eyes. And the enemy and his minions decided to use that as a platform. Jesus told us persecution would come. I would see them, just the rage and the hate. I pictured them doing that at the foot of the cross to Jesus. And I just remembered what he said. Forgive them, Father. They know not what they do. And so I had to position my heart that way. The Jamie Sanchez story is one of the videos of the impact [email protected] it's been a crazy, crazy ride. See Jamie's story and much [email protected]

Turn by Ben Fuller: Turns out I'm not strong as I thought. But that's when I learned that you are. When I'm weak you are strong. When I fall short, you go on and on. When I run, I can't run long. Cause your love will chase me down? Till I got nowhere to turn but Jesus. I turn it over all over Let you turn it around Turn it around Screaming my. I turn it all over Won't you turn it around? Turn it around.

Dr. Jessica Peck: Welcome back, friends. That is turn by Ben Fuller. And I've invited you today to. To turn toward an attitude of gratitude. That is the last of our eight communication principles that we've been talking about for healthy habits. And we're about to start moving into a long time where we'll sit with technology because that is impacting so many families today. But one thing that is impacting families is Mother's Day. And Mother's Day is coming up this weekend. I want to say happy Mother's Day to all of the mothers out there. now I want to take a little space for this and talk about this. Usually on Fridays, I talk about home front headlines, but today I just feel convicted to give you a little Mother's Day message because. And to give you some insight on how to really make the most of that. No matter where you are, who you are, I'm not just talking to mothers. I'm talking to anyone who has a mother, and that would be everyone in the world. So no matter what your. Your state is with your mother, and I'll talk about that. I know that Mother's Day can bring about a lot of really complicated emotions for people. I'm certainly one of those people where it's a blessing and also a little grief that you're holding, that just kind of odd mixture of blessing and grief. And sometimes it's a lot more grief, sometimes that's a lot more blessing. But it's a wonderful opportunity. And it's not lost on me that today we were talking about gratitude. And the message that I wrote about Mother's Day for the stand was about gratitude. So wherever you are, man, woman, child, listen, this is for you. Mother's Day, no matter what, is a wonderful opportunity to give a beautiful expression of love and appreciation for any woman who played a mothering role in your life. Now, that may be the mother who birthed you, who raised you, who nurtured you, and God's design for family, maybe other mother figures around you. Wives, grandmothers, daughters, sisters, cousins, aunts, nieces, friends. Think about the people in your life who played a mothering role when you most needed it. And that's a person. That's a thought that you can hold on to for Mother's Day. And really, every time you feel that kind of twinge of. Of grief, of guilt, of just whatever negativity may be hounding you, think about that blessing that God has given you. Because in a broken world, Mother's Day is filled with a lot of complicated emotions. We start to see, even now, companies giving you the option to pause and to opt out of advertising, saying, okay, if you don't want to get anything from us, we'll pause that. We won't send you anything until that's over. I know I have been in the card aisle of a drugstore, and I have seen grown men weeping, trying to choose a card for their mother and. And weeping for all kinds of reasons, good, bad, and very, very ugly. And it can bring tears for men, women, children alike. Now, some of you, you may grieve a mother who was really well loved and who has gone on to be with the Lord. Maybe you grieve a faithful woman and that her absence just casts the day in a shadow of grief. And some of you may be grieving a mother who is still very much living, who is physically present in the world, but maybe physically absent from your life, maybe emotionally absent. You have a physically present mother, but an emotionally absent mother. Maybe you even have an abusive mother mother who was verbally abusive or physically abusive. Some grieve the loss of young children and they're grieving on Mother's Day. They've lost their own children, or maybe they're estranged from their adult children and some grieve the unfulfilled dream of wanting to be a mother so badly themselves and just for whatever reason, that has not worked out for them. Now, when your mothering circumstances are complicated, that day can be really plagued by guilt and grieving and gloomy predictions. Mostly in these couple of days leading up to it. Every decision can be feel feel plagued by self doubt. Like should you go or should you not? Like should you call? Should you send a card? Did you pick the right gift? Should you a gift? Should you not? Is this the right restaurant? Should we have dinner at home? Should we invite them? Is it the right card? Should I? What should I send? Should I send a gift card? Inevitably, in those kinds of situations, someone seems to always end up hurt somehow, especially other family members who are trying so hard to fill in that gap. They see your pain and they want so badly to serve you in it. They want so badly to bless you, to make you feel better, to fix the circumstance, even though they know they can't. But then somehow they feel like they can never do enough, they can never be enough, they can never say enough to make up for that loss that you feel. That's a tough thing. Now, many mothers long to enjoy the holiday, but in a world of comparison, there's also this very common lie that what others do for you on Mother's Day is a report card of your mothering. So if your husband, if your children, if they read your minds, exactly, if they get you exactly the right gift, exactly the right breakfast in bed, exactly a swoon worthy, social media worthy gift. You know, something that's so perfectly orchestrated, well then that must mean, of course, that you're a great mom and you deserve such treatment and you have raised children who have learned to do that and you have trained your husband sufficiently to be able to give you exactly what you want, which is so toxic on so many levels. And if not, then that means, well, I guess I'm a failure, I'm unworthy of love or recognition. And this is such a lie. And I encourage you. If that is you, I know that that is not a lot of you, but if that is you, I encourage you to look to the good intentions of your family, release them from the prison of your expectations, and just accept whatever the day brings to you.

Mother's Day can bring discouragement for single moms

Now, I think for single moms, it can be really easy to feel the weight of everything that you carry alone. There's no one there to orchestrate this grand gesture of recognition. And the day can bring discouragement and amplify inner fears and struggles, especially when there's no one to witness that. Your mothering journey in a way that maybe you think you would have if you weren't single. Well, here's a reality check as we've been talking about today. No matter the circumstance, you can always choose an attitude of gratitude. You cannot choose so much about your circumstances, and there's so much I wish I could choose about my own personal circumstances, but I can't. But I can choose my attitude about that. And remember, first, Thessalonians 5. 18 tells us, in everything, give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. So what can you be grateful for this Mother's Day? If you have a faithful mother who loves you well, who is a woman of God, who is worthy to be praised by all means, express your gratitude with lavish words of praise. Do the brunch, get the gifts, like bring all the kids, tell all the people, and I will tell you that those kinds of things, if you will open your eyes. If you don't have that and you're looking that instead of being jealous and thinking, I wish I could have that, say that is evidence of hope for that. I can create that. I can be a chain breaker. I can be a cycle breaker. And if you don't have that, you think, okay, well, that was not me. So, X that category. Well, then I challenge you. How can you pay tribute to the women in your life who mothered you in the moments you needed it? Was there someone that you can reach out to that you can send a card to, that Maybe you weren't even thinking about sending a card to this person. Maybe there was a teacher who was there at the right moment, maybe a. A Sunday school leader, maybe a neighbor. Who was it who mothered you and needs to hear that appreciation? Maybe it's been 30, 40, 50 years, but you can track them down and you can tell them, thank you. Now, if you're grieving the loss of. Of a mother who had a life well lived well, how can you honor the maternal memory of that with gratitude for a gift so great that it is worth grieving? I think about that all the Time. How wonderful it must be to have a gift that great that is worth grieving. And if you're feeling the loss of a husband, to bear witness to the labor of love. As a mother, how can you find gratitude for those people who are loving you enough to stand in the gap and support you? Now, Mother's Day doesn't demand that you ignore or you gloss over those complicated emotions you feel. Mothering stories are really tender and honestly, they're deeply personal, and so much of what shapes them is way beyond your control. But even here, we can be invited into a gentle choice. Who will you celebrate and how will you show gratitude? On this weekend, on this day, from a place of being deeply known and loved by God, you can choose to reflect his love to others with grace and grit, as my granny would say. And gratitude for the mothers in your life whose faithful service has pointed you toward the love of Christ. Because no matter what your mothering circumstance, you are seen and known and deeply loved by God.

I pray for supernatural comfort for each one of you on Mother's Day

And I have a Mother's Day blessing that I really want to pray over each one of you as we close our time together here. For the single mamas out there, I. I really. I see you. I see what you're doing. For every difficult thing that you do with no one there to bear witness to your courage and sacrifice, I pray that you would feel seen and appreciated and loved. And may people in your path show up big unexpectedly with tangible support and words of encouragement. May the love of your children nourish your spirit and renew your strength. May you know you are never alone. For those women who are longing to be mamas, I tell you, give yourself grace and space to take the day in whatever way it comes. Comes. For every ache that you have felt in desiring a child of your own, for every disappointment you felt at another possibility fallen through, I pray for supernatural comfort for you on this day. I pray that your heart would be protected from the unintended insensitivity of others. I pray that you'll be blessed with just the right word of encouragement and the longings of your heart will be nourished by hope. For those momas who are grieving, who carry unimaginable tragedy, unspeakable grief, I pray that you'll be blessed with a flood of hidden memories, precious moments that are long forgotten, that are brought to your mind, and they bring a smile to your face, laughter, comfort to warmth, your warm, your heart. I pray that you'll find joy and the loved ones around you in a peace that passes understanding for those Mamas out there who are missing their own mamas. I pray for those of you who would give just anything for one more conversation, one more hug, one more moment. I definitely feel this way about my own granny. May your grief be eased in the revelation that something so beautiful to be missed so greatly is a treasure that's longed for by many. I pray that you will find joy and honoring the legacy of your beautiful mother through your actions and your spirit to honor what she gave you. For those mamas who are experiencing brokenness in any way, the torturous ache of having a mama but not really having a mama, and healthy relationships, I pray that you would be comforted. I pray you're released from any guilt. That you would be shielded from pain, that you would be set free from claims of unhealthy bonds. And I pray that you find a peace and a lightness of spirit. I pray that those who love you would fill the empty places in your heart with immeasurable joy. For those brokenhearted mamas, those who are brokenhearted over the choices of your children, those who ache to be restored in an estranged relationship, those who agonize over every whisper of failure that echoes in your heart. I pray that you would be reassured and comforted, that you would find forgiveness for yourself and forgiveness for your child. I pray for release from sh. From. From guilt and shame. And I, pray that you find freedom in the present and hope for restoration in the future. And last but not least, for those happy mamas. For every happy mama with happy kids and a happy marriage. And you think my life is great and I love it and it's going great. I pray that you would continue to be blessed with immeasurable joy. I pray that you would be protected from feelings of guilt rising from any awareness of the weight of your blessing. I pray that the burden of others pains wouldn't overshadow your own journey and that your joy would be a beacon of light and hope to all around you. I pray that you celebrate the beauty of your blessing and that you would feel cherished and loved. And when I look at that, those. The hard. Those of you who are in the hard days of motheringhood, motherhood, whatever that may be, whether that is the newborn tiredness, the. The toddler tantrums, it's the. The constant coming and going of school age kids, the trials that come with teens or adults, wherever it is, I. I hope that you know that it is in the mundane that becomes miraculous. That is where your legacy as a mom is cemented. Not in the grand gestures, not in the breakfast in bed. And please, like there's a lot of mamas who would say let's just skip that so I don't have to clean up the mess. But it is in changing diapers and wiping noses and doing carpool and chauffeur and all of those little gestures and hugs after disappointment and shopping for school shoes. All of those things are where the legacy of your motherhood becomes so miraculous. And so whatever your mothering circumstance, I pray as I always do, that the Lord will bless you and keep you and make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you. The Lord lift his countenance upon you and give you peace. I pray that your heart will be moved to intentionally bless the mothers that God has placed in your life with affirmation and most of all, gratitude. I pray that you would pray that gratitude would be just the new cultural norm and emotional tone in your home. It is possible, it is transformational and it is for your good. I'll see you right back here on Monday.

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Jeff Chamblee: opinions expressed in this broadcast may not necessarily reflect those of the American Family association or American Family Radio.

It's Ask Dr. Nurse Mama Friday! Jessica introduces this week's healthy habit of speaking gratitude, and answers your questions about Mother's Day.