Abraham Hamilton III Darkness is not an affirmative force. It simply reoccupies the space vacated by the light.

Abraham Hamilton III This is the uh, Hamilton Corner on American Family Radio.

Abraham Hamilton III It should be uncomfortable for a believer to live as a hypocrite, delivering people

Abraham Hamilton III out of the bondage of mainstream media and the philosophies of this world.

Abraham Hamilton III God has called you and me to be his ambassadors even in this dark moment. Let's not miss our moment.

Abraham Hamilton III And uh, now the uh, Hamilton Corner.

Abraham Hamilton III Good evening everyone. Welcome to the Hamilton Corner. Abraham Hamilton III is my name and we are ready to rock and roll with today's edition of the program. Of course we have the producer extraordinaire, the real J. Mack, holding down the fort for us as we are ready to proceed with today's program. At this very moment, many of you, if not most of you, are making your transition from your part time jobs where you generate an income to your full time jobs at uh, where you generate an outcome. And as you do so, I want to remind you to do so with intentionality, understanding the primacy that God places on family in welcoming his view, to govern, to guard and to guide your view as you engage. I say this repeatedly and I will continue to do so. Uh, we will never out politic out, uh, vote out Supreme Court opinion, especially if you read that opinion from this week concerning mail in ballots. Oh my goodness. Um, we will never outpace the deficiencies that abound in the home. God established the family with marriage at the center as his first institution, intentionally. That is not a casual coincidence of creation. It is God's divine design. He did that intentionally. It is why the family is the fundamental building block of the church. Yes. And it likewise is the foundational and fundamental building block of society. And if you evaluate, uh, the encroachment of the ever expanding, you know, Leviathan state, it corresponds with retrenchments that have transpired in the family. You know, it is as a result of families disintegrating to a degree. We have an expansion of things like nursing, uh, home facilities and other things like that. If you survey our nation's history, that is a relatively recent phenomenon. That is something that did not happen, uh, in a general sense in terms of the majority of the population historically in our nation's history. But as the family has retrenched and as the family has been disintegrated, then the state has stepped in in various places, in various ways. And it is also, it should not be lost on us that God has given commands that apply within the familial context. I Say this, and this is no shade, uh, to youth pastors. But the Lord did not say, youth pastors rear other people's children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. That is not in the Scripture. Of course, the church has a role. Uh, pastoral staff can aid the family, but the family is the first institution. It is my responsibility as a father to lead in the evangelizing and the catechizing and the discipling of the children that God has blessed my wife and I with. That is my primary responsibility. Now. The church's role is to equip the saints for the work of ministry. One of the foremost components of that equipping is for churches to enforce. Hey, by the way, do you realize that God has ordained you as a first line responder to what transpires in your home? Do you realize that secondarily, are you equipped for that task? You know, that's one of the things we talk about in our local church. I know people familiar with the concept of baby dedications, but we often discuss parental commitments. God has blessed you to conceive, uh, new image bearer. So God has blessed you to adopt an additional image bearer in your family. Are you committed to obeying what God requires of you as a parent? Are you husband and father committed to meeting and obeying God's responsibility? As Ephesians 6:4 says, fathers, do not exasperate your children, rather rear them in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Are you committed to obeying that Scripture? Because family and parenting is not merely a relational context, it's a station of mission. And if we can understand that and embrace it and apply the Scripture, starting first and foremost in our homes, then there's no question as to what could transpire in society. So as you are making your way transitioning from your part time jobs to your full time jobs, do so with insight, biblical revelation and intentionality and understanding that that is your first outlet to light up the darkness. That's your first external outpost to execute the King's commission. And as you've heard me say numerous times, uh, husbands and wives, don't allow the presence of your children to cause you to neglect your spouse. Because that is the first thing. My first responsibility for my children is to demonstrate to them with Christlike love for my wife, looks like in practical application, because in so doing, I set a foundational guardrail, if you will, for both my sons and my daughters as to what they should expect to meet, should God bless them to be able to forge a family on Their own to the word of God. We go. We're going to begin the program today in Matthew chapter 19. And this is going to contribute to what we are going to discuss throughout today's program in Matthew 19. I want to go here because, um, it's. It's sadly stated, um, quite erroneously that, well, Abraham, Jesus never said anything about, uh, family and marriage. Jesus never condemned homosexuality. Jesus never did any of these things. And I was like, madan ting. So you're sadly mistaken. Why sadly mistaken? You did not read the Bible correctly. You're not rightly dividing the word of truth. The first error that is committed when that type of assertion is made is the erroneous assertion that Jesus has no bearing on the Hebrew scriptures, the Old Testament, the Hebrew Bible. The Hebrew Bible is a part of the word of Jesus Christ. When the Bible says in the beginning, God, the Hebrew word for God there is Elohim, which is a plural word, in fact, that reflects the triune Godhead, Father, Son and Spirit. This is why the apostle Jon explains in Jon 1 that in the beginning the word was God, the Logos was God. He was there in the beginning. This is why the apostle Paul says, all things were created, they were created through Jesus and created for him. So everything from Genesis to Malachi is included in the word of Christ. Not only that. When specifically asked about marriage, Jesus, uh, affirms the incarnate Messiah during his incarnate ministry in his first advent. Hey, hey. Because another one's on the way. In his first advent, Jesus, in answering a question concerning marriage, affirms, uh, the biblical creation narrative and affirms, uh, his definition that he announced in Genesis as to what a marriage consists of. All right. And that's what we're going to read in Matthew chapter 19. So when Jesus is asked a question about marriage, he, he responds. If you look at verse four, it says he answered, meaning Jesus answered. He answered. Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning, made them male and female and said, therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast or cleave to his wife, to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh, so they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate. Now, what may not be obvious, that when Jesus offers this answer, when he says in verse four, have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female? So that is a direct quote from Jesus quoting Genesis, chapter 1, verse 27. So when Jesus is presented with the question concerning marriage, he doesn't just immediately go, so, well, let me tell you all about marriage. He begins by affirming what he already said. Some of y'. All. Y' all catch up to that in a moment. What he already said in Genesis, chapter one. All right. Then when he goes on to say in verse five, and therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. That is a direct quotation from Genesis, chapter 2, verse 24. So Jesus affirms the creation account of, uh, what maleness is, what femaleness is, and what marriage is. Notice he says, a man shall be joined to his wife. That's not my word. That's his word, his wife. So let's dig a bit deeper. Why is that important? Well, when he says, therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, the Greek word there literally means an adult male for man. An adult male. A mature male is the word in Greek. And he says, and this man shall leave his father and mother. Isn't that interesting? Though Adam and Eve have no biological parentage, God nevertheless announces that the origin, uh, source, if you will, for candidates for marriage, will derive from a familial unit that is comprised of a father and a mother, a pater and a mater, which also is, you guessed it, a, ah, man and a woman. A man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife. The Greek word there for wife is gune, which forms a root word for a particular medical discipline that we have currently called gynecology. All the sisters, y' all know what I'm talking about, right? Some of the fellows like Gyne, who. Gynegalh, Gynegalapado, Galapagos, Gynecology, Gune. There's only. I want to be gentle here and kind. But there's a certain kind of plumbing that would make one conducive to the medical practice of a gynecologist. All right, y' all with me. And here's the thing. Jesus announces this. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, be joined to his wife.

Abraham Hamilton III And.

Abraham Hamilton III And the two shall become one flesh. Jesus affirms that the only physical conjugal complementarity that would comprise a union between a aren and a gune will lead to a one flesh union. That's reflecting the physical conjugal reality, also the spiritual reality, which is why he goes on to say, and what? They're no longer two, but one flesh. And what therefore God is joined together. Let not man separate. Now, here's something that is a radical revelation, especially when you consider its contrast with previous societies, like medieval societies and others. Because in previous societies, even in patriarchal societies, historically, whenever there was a marriage, there was an expectation that only the wife would leave her family and become a part of the husband's family. But notice, God doesn't do that. God places a particularized affirmative duty upon the man to say, no, no, no. It's. It's not only the wife who's leaving her family. It's also the man shall leave his father and mother, turn his attention, direction and focus to his wife, and they are forming a new familial unit or a new band, the band for which the husband is the house band. The new primary physical, natural investment is the husband into his wife and the wife into her husband. And. And what God has joined together, no longer two, but one. And what God has joined together, let no man not families of origin, not in laws sometimes called outlaws, not the culture, not the world. What God has joined together, let no man tear asunder Let no man separate. What God is conveying to us there, brothers and sisters, is that there is an elevated responsibility and elevated attention, an elevated priority that must be placed upon that union between the man and the wife, the husband and the wife. But in many ways, we've suffered kind of, um, a injury by a thousand blows to the familial institution, to the marital union, allowing it to be kind of relegated to a secondary posture. But we have to reverse that. The biblical adage to leave and to cleave is not just, uh, uh, sounding. Not just poetic verbiage. It's not just something that sounds good. It's not this, oh, yeah, go on your honeymoon, child and y' all will be all right. No, it's meant to convey a transition in life priority, which is why this union between a husband and his wife, that is a lifelong union with the capacity to bear offspring, is the only institution, the only human institution that's been described in scripture as illustrative of Christ and his bride. It really is a big deal, guys. It really, really, really is a big deal. And I know there's a lot of noise around us. There are lots of things that are transpiring. But as I've been saying repeatedly, I don't want to be among the ranks of those who just diagnose the darkness. I want to be a part of the ranks that put the light on the lampstand. And one of the central features of the light being put on the lampstand is that we embrace God's perspective as it pertains to marriage and family. Family. So when Jesus affirms the creation account and describes to the exclusion of any counterfeits that the marital union is comprised of a mature male and a mature female, there's a reason why both Adam and Eve were created full grown. They were not created as adolescents. They were created and staged in the, in the state of maturity intentionally. And that is the state that the two were joined as the first first couple in human history. The first married couple in human history. There's a reason for that. And we would be served well to embrace God's view on this vital first institution. Hello, I'm Abraham Hamilton iii. Did you know that this content is listener supported? Without people like you, this podcast would not exist. That's why we need you. A generous monthly gift of any amount will help sustain American Family Radio and specifically this podcast. Please consider becoming a monthly financial partner today by visiting afr.netgive that's afr.net give.

Abraham Hamilton III Shining light into the darkness. This is the Hamilton Corner on American Family Radio.

Abraham Hamilton III Welcome back to the Hamilton Corner, Abraham Hamilton III here. I'm delighted to be joined by my lovely wife here, here in studio. Last time we were together, uh, we were having a conversation really following the, the, the tragedies with the trial, ah, in Massachusetts where this wife and mother who was a nurse herself murdered three of her young children. And um, how the culture has really turned in a general sense, uh, really towards a hostility at certain levels, uh, toward children, but in a more particular sense, uh, to really persuade women largely as a result of, you know, second wave feminism thereafter, uh, to scorn really childbearing and child rearing as you know, something to be rescued from as opposed to recognize that it's one of the God designed unique features that apply to women that men cannot do, cannot be a part of. And how so many of uh, women in our society who are image bearers of God, but they've been seduced into the lie that will get them to forego or entirely abandon or at worst even if they don't abandon it, they will lionize all of the things that transpire outside of the home. But to diminish the gloriousness of following the Lord and to recognize the home as central to God's vision, uh, for his kingdom and the family is central to God's vision for his kingdom and to uh, scorn that in favor of doing what? Punching the clock somewhere else, you know, uh, embracing the kind of boss babe kind of phenomenon. And it's had, uh, quite a deleterious effect. And as I kept saying that you have people protesting in favor of a woman who murdered her children. I haven't seen anybody doing any type of public lament or anything in favor of the children. Like the children seem to be just a footnote in the story. And even I played audio on the show. One of the jurors was astounded that the one male juror who was a holdout and I learned he's a father and all kind of things, he just couldn't get past that, uh, the defendant had viciously murdered her own children. Yeah, that's kind of the point. That is kind of the point. But in light of that, I wanted to have a conversation today on the flip side, because as I've explained numerous times, people say things, you know, there's a, there's, there's a war on masculinity. And I'm saying, well, really, it's a demonic attack on God's image bearers. In total, it's, it's an attack on masculinity. It's a demonic attack on femininity because it's an effort to try to reverse God's design for his image bearers and to cause us to forfeit and abandon what God has ordained for us and to embrace, ah, countervailing narratives and treat them into, lionize them. And I was been doing some readings and research on my own and I came across, um, a book by Nancy Pearcey that we're going to get into. And she posits a thesis in the book, and this is the thesis. What happened to children when fathers left home all day for work in factories or in offices corresponding to the Industrial Revolution? Well, the short answer, and this is Nancy Pearcey's short answer. Her short answer is they were the first generation of American men to be raised by women. Go a little bit further, she writes, quote, boys found themselves with a great deal of unstructured time to spend with their peers, free from their father's guidance and supervision. What structure they did have was largely enforced by women, by mothers and female teachers. The best known psychologist of the time, G. Stanley hall, wrote a groundbreaking tone titled Adolescence, which was published in 1904, in which he deplored the lack of fathering. Never has the American boy been quite so wild as now. And never in the world have so many young cubs been so half orphaned and left to female guidance in school, in home and church. Over time, with this reality setting in our culture, in boys in particular, began to regard godliness, virtue, and things that are taught in scripture, and to associate them exclusively with femininity. And so boys began to adopt this notion of being wild in an effort to reject the concept of being associated with femininity. When you hear me read those things from Nancy Pearcey's book, and I'm talking about her book titled, uh, the Toxic War on Masculinity and How Christianity Reconciles the Sexist. When you hear me read that, Maria, what comes to your mind?

Maria Hamilton Yeah, you know, I hadn't. I hadn't really considered the impact on the young boys, you know, growing up, uh, in the era that we've grown up in, where we are raised by our moms, you know, all the children are primarily. And I know in my culture growing up in Puerto Rico, fathers went to work and mothers stayed home. And we were raised by our moms. And so for. I didn't ever considered about how that would impact the sons to not have that masculine presence, um, for the majority of their day, you know, and I can see that, you know, I know that God has created us, uh, in his image and likeness, and he's made us, uh, he's given us specific personalities. And um, you have the boys, you know, who are, uh, strong willed. And then you have the boys who are, uh, rule followers. And so we, you know, we can see that, and we can see that both girls and boys, but we can see that in boys. But I never considered that rebellious, uh, streak or that wild, you know, let boys be boys. Be a rejection, if you are somewhat of a rejection to the feminized home environment. And it's important that fathers understand this because we know, um, in our own very own home, in our own experience, how I can, um, uh, not wanting to, right, but like, be a somewhat of a detriment to our boys. Either moms want to coddle the boys too much, um, we want to protect them too much, or we want to, um, we don't trust them because they're wild, you know, quote unquote, that we want to like, uh, kind of house them, kind of keep him controlled. And that stifles their development as masculine men. And so it's incredibly important that husbands understand their role.

Abraham Hamilton III Man, there's so many, so many incredible insights in this book. She goes on to say, quote, let's set the stage. Prior to the Industrial Revolution, children worked alongside their parents, siblings and extended family. Most of the day, children chopped wood, tended gardens, milked cows, fed chickens, worked in the fields, and took care of younger siblings. Children knew they were indispensable partners in the family's economic enterprise. But after the Industrial Revolution, social commentators began to lament the loss of children's chores, especially for boys whose fathers were no longer available to supervise daily tasks. Fathers could no longer include their sons in their own work either, because it took place outside the home. As a result, work no longer offered a way to connect fathers with their sons. And without a role model provided by fathers, boys became unsure about what it meant to be a man. Now, I want to be clear about something. Obviously there were benefits from the Industrial Revolution. It was one of the major things that led to America becoming an economic superpower on the world stage, of course. But we also should not, uh, be callous toward unintended consequences that might have developed and the massive societal shift that occurred with the Industrial Revolution and how it impacted children. Yeah, you had some thoughts after that for the last.

Maria Hamilton Yeah, I mean, I'm just thinking about, um, the family unit, you know, and how weak it has become, um, as the generations continue. Right. As the decades go on, and how weaker and weaker and weaker. We know that the work of the enemy is to completely sever us from Christ, from the Lord. And one of the best ways, one of the most strategic ways for him to do that is to destroy the family. And he's been doing that in many different ways. Not only with divorce. Right. That's a high rate now. Um, and, and not only, not only with like the, the disdain for having children and for, you know, growing the family. When once upon a time God said children are a blessing, now we're seeing them as a burden societally. Um, but also the concept of what a man's role in the home, what does that bring, like, what does it truly bring on a day to day basis? I'm not saying that you have to come home and do the chores that I should do. Right. Like, I'm not saying come home and clean, um, even though that'll be, you know, a blessing if you were to do that, whatever. But it's not that we're saying men become feminized and come under the authority of the keeper of the home. Right. Because women are keepers of the home. We're not saying let's not to a scripture, right. We're not saying that the fix to the problem that Nancy Pearce is highlighting is that men come under the authority of the keeper of the home. No, no, no. The husband remains the house band, like you've always explained, where women are keepers of the home. But the husband sets the tone for the home, he continues to be the leader of the home, even if he has chores and things. And outside of the home, if you will. Right. Today we don't live in an agrarian society any longer, or at least most of us don't. Right. Um, could we homestead for sure. And that's wonderful. But when husbands have things to do outside of the home, like in our example, for example, you have still the authority by God, the right of responsibility to set the tone as leader of our home and for your time to be demonstrated there, you know, and what does that look like regularly, you know.

Abraham Hamilton III Yeah. The point of this is, you know, I don't have Marty McFly's DeLorean. We're not trying to go back and pre industrial revolutionize, but the data following what the truth of scripture says, like I quoted earlier, Ephesians 6, 4, there's a reason why the Lord says through the Apostle Paul, uh, fathers, do not exasperate your children. Rather, rear them in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Rear them. Biblically speaking, child rearing was never meant to be solely the province of moms. So the issue that needs to be brought to the fore is, is that we need to get our marching orders. What is masculinity from the scripture and not from a culture that does not embrace the scripture? All right, so within our modern context, how can we, in light of the data that we have, in light, most importantly, of the scripture that we have, how can we govern ourselves to execute what God requires of me? I'm not on the farm. I'm not a farmer. I wouldn't mind of, uh, learning to be a farmer, though. I just. I just. I didn't get that certain set of skills. But how do I, in my modern context, take advantage of the time that's given me so that I am a constantly present and actively engaged participant in the rearing of my own children? That is the question.

Maria Hamilton So let me ask you a question. Right.

Abraham Hamilton III No, let's flip the script. You can't ask.

Maria Hamilton Uh, no, no, I'm a host for a second.

Abraham Hamilton III So.

Maria Hamilton So he's scared, ladies and gentlemen. Listen, uh, how do you. How would you describe your role practically in our home to set the tone? Like, how do you set the tone in our home with this shift of mentality? Not shift, because we've been living it, but, you know, like, where you embrace the idea of you being present intentionally in our home? Like, what does that look like?

Abraham Hamilton III Yeah, well, and I would add, not merely setting the tone, but actively engaging as A father as God requires me to be engaged, not just, like, setting a tone and going away.

Maria Hamilton Correct.

Abraham Hamilton III Yeah.

Abraham Hamilton III The simple reality is, as I endeavor. I know everybody has different circumstances, but I endeavor to build my schedule around my family and not my family around my schedule. Does that make sense?

Maria Hamilton That's good.

Abraham Hamilton III Yeah. Uh, so, um, you know, we have six children. We've discussed the reality that we do a lot of things corporately. You know, I lead devotions in the evenings for our families. Uh, but the majority of our family time is spent together. And so I intentionally set out time to take time to be with each of our children individually. Individually. Uh, to communicate to them that they are individually important to me. They're not just important to me as a member of the Hamilton clan, uh, but they are important to me as individual bears of God's image with individual callings, individual giftings, individual cares and concerns. And my interest in them is who they are, not merely what they produce. And so I want to, uh, schedule, um, and structure my time to reflect that in my affirmative communications to the children, as well as how my schedule is structured and make sure the children are aware of that schedule. Also, I would say, uh, that our children know there's something we say in our. Our family may sound cheesy to other people, but there's mommy, daddy time. And the children know when it's mommy, daddy time. Y' all don't come knock on the door, leave us alone. Because I need them to understand that as much as they are a priority, Mommy comes first. So those are two things that I seek to establish and then build out our family. Ah, dynamics. And. And family orchestration around the fact that family is first and everything else comes after that.

Maria Hamilton I think it's incredibly important having four boys.

Abraham Hamilton III Yeah, we have four boys and two girls.

Maria Hamilton Yes. So the four boys for the girls too, because the girls have to see what it looks like to be a man. Right. Like, up close, um, for the longest in society. And I know what happened in my culture growing up where it was traditional that the husbands left the home in the morning, you know, with their briefcase, going off to work, maybe probably more like the 70s and 80s and 90s in the United States. And they go out.

Abraham Hamilton III Actually, it dates back to further than that. I'm gonna get into that in a

Maria Hamilton moment, but go ahead real quick, real quick. So then I grew up understanding, uh, that manhood meant you go out, you bring the bacon, and that's really all you do. You just provide. Right. And so then boys were material provision. Yes. That's right. And there were so many gaps, so, so many gaps, um, that we grew up with all kinds of issues as a result. Right. So our boys are getting the blessed. I'm just so grateful to the Lord are being blessed by seeing what it looks like to be a biblical man, like to grow up to see biblical manhood in action. That is an intentional loving, um, priest cover, um, you know, provision like, provider like all these, all these aspects of manhood that God has so clearly expressed in His Word. Through all the accounts you can see his character and how that, you know, man is supposed to emulate that the boys are growing up understanding that.

Abraham Hamilton III Right.

Maria Hamilton That they don't just check out. They don't have a man, um, cave where they just get to check out. You know, I know there's, you know, anyway, so, uh, that's a blessing for boys to be able to grow up and see that.

Abraham Hamilton III Speaking of the man cave. Well, you said something earlier I wanted to mention, so respond uh, to you mentioned about the prevalence of divorce. It's interesting that the data shows that the divorce numbers actually are not as prevalent when you have a committed husband and wife who frequently worship together in corporate worship. Praise God that when you have a committed husband and wife who worship together, this data shows at a minimum three times per month that the divorce rates are severely low. The divorce rates increase when you have nominal Christians who profess to be Christians but don't really worship the Lord together, don't really go to church. And then when you have, you know, non Christians, the divorce rates are similar. Actually the divorce rates are higher amongst nominal Christians, Christians who don't worship together even than their secularized counterparts. But when you have committed Bible believing Christians, when the husband and wives worship the Lord together and demonstrated in church attendance, the divorce rates actually really, really low.

Maria Hamilton Yeah, that makes sense.

Abraham Hamilton III So I'm saying we got to get rid of this lie that divers is as high in the church as in the world. Actually that's not true because you have to distinguish between nominal Christianity and committed Bible believing active Christianity. It's an entirely different ball game. Then you also mentioned about the phenomenon on the man cave. I was surprised to learn. I'm, um, gonna share this with you guys. You might think. Did it start with the advent of, of college football and the SEC versus Big Ten rivalries? No, no, no, no. It actually started much earlier before that because it was a continuation of the uninitiated masculine repudiation. What they viewed as, as feminine virtue. Godliness was associated with feminine virtue and Men wanted to retreat from that to have an isolated, uh, pursuit of wild masculinity. We're gonna get into it on the other side of this break.

Abraham Hamilton III Building a strong biblical worldview can help our kids understand Christian values that are currently under attack. And the best time to start building their worldview is now. Activate Kids is an in depth worldview training course to help kids stand on the truth of God's word. Each unit includes video lessons, student workbook, parent leader guide, games, crafts and memory verses. Activate Kids is designed for kids 6 to 12 and it's available at activatekids.afa.net. The Hamilton quarter podcast and one minute commentary are available at afr.net, back to the Hamilton Corner on American Family Radio.

Abraham Hamilton III Welcome back to the Hamilton Corner, Abraham Hamilton iii here with my lovely wife, Maria Hamilton. And we're having a conversation about biblical manhood. And in addition to that, kind of, as a subscript, what happened to the formation of families following the Industrial Revolution? And what was the impact, uh, particularly upon boys with a transition in the way that fathers, uh, earned a living? And we started a conversation which is something to introduce a topic that was somewhat surprising to me to learn that the phenomenon of the man cave is something that is not a recent phenomenon. It actually dates back quite a ways. And I want to share a little bit of that with you. Uh, back to Nancy Pearcey's book. Uh, she begins now to say, well, what happened to these boys when you have the first generation of men who are raised by women? And as I mentioned earlier, there was an effort to begin to repudiate what they described as civilized, being civilized and saying that that was associated with, uh, femininity. You know, actually that's where the term sissy came from. The term sissy initially came from that was a term that was used to address one sister. But boys began to describe one another in that term by saying, you were acting like a girl, by being honorable, by being respectful, uh, by having manners. Those things were no longer deemed to be virtuous. Uh, they were identified overly as being feminine. So that's how the term began to be utilized. But Nancy Pearce, he writes this quote, what happened as these boys grew up, they brought boy culture with them. Now think about, these are boys growing up into men, but they're bringing boy culture with them. They bring boy culture. They brought boy culture with them as adults. They continued to protest against the imposition of what they saw as women's standards, a new word into the English language, over civilized.

Maria Hamilton Wow.

Abraham Hamilton III Um, people began to worry that city boys were becoming soft and emasculated. They were no longer the strapping young men produced by harsh pioneer days or rugged farm life. The three principal institutions that dominated early childhood socialization, family, religion, religion and education were increasingly staffed and run by women. Men began to feel that to retrieve a sense of robust manhood, they needed to escape from women and the home and even from civilization itself. Philosopher, uh, and poet Henry David Thoreau became famous for living a semi hermit life at Walden Pond. Why did he feel compelled to leave town and live alone by a lake? In his words, a civilized man's house is a prison in which he finds himself oppressed and confined. M To avoid stagnating, Thoreau said, we need the tonic of wildness. The drive to escape was at first expressed in small ways. Most men did not have their own Walden Pond, but they began to seek ways to withdraw even within the home. Around the 1850s, houses began to be built with a separate den for the husband as an escape from the pressures of family life. The proverbial man cave.

Abraham Hamilton III Wow.

Abraham Hamilton III Uh, end quote, y'. All. That dates back to 1850, where you then had a theme that in order for something to be masculine, the man had to be away from family, away from wife, away from children. Out in the pioneer, alone at sea, uh, in different places, adventures where. Yeah, the adventure, though, was viewed as something that had to be away from family, which m was a contrast. When you read literature prior to the industrial revolution, it would discuss man husbands and men's adventures would include the home that it was a central feature. But that began to turn the structure to the degree to where, even now, even as I travel to homeschool families, um, the homeschool conferences and minister. One of the things that's a frequent question is, well, I'm a dad. What do I do?

Maria Hamilton Yeah. Without any clue.

Abraham Hamilton III Without.

Maria Hamilton Yeah.

Abraham Hamilton III With the expectation that this is something that is outside of what should be my jersey.

Maria Hamilton Yeah.

Abraham Hamilton III But the question is, what does the scripture say? You wanted to react to that.

Maria Hamilton Yeah, I mean, I'm just thinking about the whole adventure, uh, perspective, where the adventure is fun and thrilling and it pleases the man and the family is boring. There's shackles. You know, these ideas are demonic. That's from the devil. I think one thing though, that we have to make sure we, we reiterate is in modern America, when we. Because a lot of times, especially, uh, for those of us that are stay at home moms, if we embrace the idea that our husbands, quote unquote, come home or have more of an intentional, you know, dedicated time in the home. Sometimes we cringe at that. Right? Because we're like, man, this is my. Like, this is my domain. I run this. I'm the one that's been called to be a keeper of the home, and rightly so. Um, but. But we don't want any interruptions. We want the man cave. Go over there and play your little video games, and I'm gonna be over here running the show where that's ungodly on both fronts. Right. The man wants to check out, and the husband don't want the man to come in and be the leader of the home because we want to be the leaders, you know, and it's unfortunate because that's the demonic, uh, deceit. So we as wives, also, we need to understand that our rightful role as helpers is a blessing from God for the health of the family. Like, our role is extremely pivotal, but in the right way, in the right place. Right. Like, likewise for you guys as husbands that you. I set. I say set the tone, but it is an intentional living in the home and providing that, uh, atmosphere and culture of leadership in the home so that the wife and the children can function and be as fruitful as possible according to the way that God designed it. I think when everybody embraces their role properly in the home, becomes a strong and healthy home, that impacts then the church and then the society and in our culture at large. Um, but I think as wives, we have to remember to, um, to step back and let the husbands lead, you know?

Abraham Hamilton III Yeah. And. And I want to reiterate a point that I. That I made earlier. And I think it's important to reiterate this. I'm, um. I. I am not hankering for. We gotta go back to ye olden day.

Maria Hamilton Right?

Abraham Hamilton III That's. That's not what I'm saying. What I'm saying is that what we should seek as Christ followers and Bible believers, we should seek to employ what God requires of us in his word.

Maria Hamilton Amen.

Abraham Hamilton III Uh, and not taking. Not take our marching orders from what is prevalent in the culture in a fallen world, but we go back to ground zero, which is God's word. What does God's word say and seek to construct within our modern context, but to construct our operation consistent with what the scripture says, because it's not to take. There's a reason, like men, we're larger normally. We have more bone density, we have more testosterone. We have more of the chemical makeup to make us risk takers. None of that needs to be, uh, tamped, uh, down or eliminated. But how do we exercise that in a biblical manner. And I've often said there has been no greater adventure than following the Lord's will.

Maria Hamilton Amen.

Abraham Hamilton III And leading my family in that regard to see there's no greater thing to do with your life than to put it in the center of God's hand and say, lord, what do you want to build?

Maria Hamilton Amen.

Abraham Hamilton III M. In life, in this life and through this life. And then carrying a, uh, family with me in that direction. This is the way. Walk ye therein. This is what it looks like to follow the Lord, because the reality is he calls us to be peculiar. So one of the major indicators that what God calls us to do, it ain't going to look like what's popular on the broad road of the world.

Maria Hamilton That's right.

Abraham Hamilton III It's going to be swimming against the current, is going to be swimming upstream and having that reality. Not something we pursue in isolation and segregated from what we do in our families, but that being a central feature of what it means to be a godly man in our families. And then we execute what God calls us to do. Uh, the cultural mandate, the creation mandate, uh, subduing the earth in subjection to the lordship of Christ. That is what, what I am in advocating for and encouraging in us to have an objective and honest conversation and look at what's happening as you're hearing me talk. Do you think the cultivation of the hearts and minds is something that's just a woman's job, your wife's job? Do you see that authority to her exclusively? You know, have you not considered that the Scripture says, again, fathers, do not exasperate your children, rear them in the discipline and instruction of the Lord? Do you think it's a coincidence that mom can say something a certain way, but Daddy says it one time and there's a different response? You think that's a coincidence? Because it's not.

Maria Hamilton And also, also the reality that wives get so, um, or can get so like, emotionally frustrated with those moments where the children are, you know, just not behaving and they're, they're, you know, they need to be disciplined and they need to be, you know, character needs to be reformed and all those things. And we feel the weight of, like, I'm raising them again. For those of us that are staying at home moms, that's our full time, uh, you know, investment. And so we're here and we're working and working. And then, man, when husbands get home, we're like, man, tag, you're it. Like, I need to go and shower, you know, but those moments shouldn't be. And I'm not talking about a utopia, right? I'm talking about a reality of working together on what it's supposed, what it's, what is the culture of the home and what is, should, what should it reflect, right? The character of God. So when, when the scriptures say the, uh, discipline and instruction of the Lord, it is a cultivation of the heart and the mind. How will you do that, Father, husband, if you are elsewhere majority of the time, or not involved, let's say it that way, right? Um, you have to, you have to be able to inspect the heart of the children. You have to have the time to see, uh, how your wife is doing, to be able to lead and say, this is what we're going to do with this child. And we do this all the time. We have what we call debriefings where we're like, man, this child is exhibiting this type of, uh, heart condition. And I've been, you know, telling them this and this and that, and I have an anecdote, if you don't mind, if you want me sharing. So, um, earlier this week, the kids. So our kids have chores, right? And so they had.

Abraham Hamilton III I heard that they have chores.

Maria Hamilton Yes, yes. We old school up in here. So, um, they. Every Saturday they're supposed to clean their bedrooms and their bathrooms. They do their own laundry as well. Like, literally, I do not clean their bedrooms or their bathrooms and I do not wash their clothes. I only wash my husband's ears and our little babies son because he's too little. Um, and so they're supposed to do these things. I don't have to.

Abraham Hamilton III Let me say this. We're not saying you have to be identical to us. That's how we're doing it.

Maria Hamilton This is how we're doing it. Yeah. So I should not have to stay on top of them to do this because we have explained how this is to be done, right? So Monday I go to. Yeah, Monday I go to their bathroom. And it looks like a murder scene. It legitimately looks like a murder scene. Okay. Like, it looks like it has not been touched. Now, I could take the blame that I should have probably been on top of it a little bit more, right? But I was trusting my kids. Error on my part. Um, and I was like, lord, uh, if you don't help me, holy Spirit, I'm going to sin against these children. Because I'm like on nine right now. What is this? Right? So I was very firm in explaining to them. And come in here and look at this mirror and look at this sink. And it's not about, I want a Spick and Span, you know, catalog house that I can put on Pinterest. That is not it. I want their character. I want them to honor God with what is required of them. When we say, I'm going to clean my room, we do it heartily, as unto the Lord and not unto men. It is not to please others. Nobody goes into their bathroom, so it's not for others. It is not even for mommy and daddy's approval. It is for them to glorify God in all that they do. Now, I don't understand their children, but I'm not going to excuse that they're children and say, oh, because they're children, therefore I should expect sin. No sin is to be casted out. We defeat is death. Yeah. So we are not going to give in to that idea. So I, you know, felt like I was becoming Godzilla, and I was like, oh, Lord. So I went to my room, and you were there, and I was like, Abraham Hamilton III, listen to me carefully. These boys, 11 and nine, I'm sorry, you are old enough to understand the instruction and to clean a, um, mirror. Come on. So I know the character can lean toward laziness and, like, bare minimum, so they can get to what they want to really, really do. Right? So I am, like, emotionally, like, angry because I'm like, how do I get these children's hearts to be right with God? You know? And I'm already, like, borderline like, oh, God, I don't want to sin. So you.

Abraham Hamilton III It's the spirit of God that does that. But anyway, amen.

Maria Hamilton Amen. Um, and so you very calmly don't even. You don't even, like, go and, like, boys come in here. None of that. None of that. Hours go by, I'm over here venting like, I can't believe it. I don't understand it, and all these things. And then you later on say, okay, I know what I got to do. I got to. I'm going to talk to them tonight very calmly, very. I'm, like, already, like, you know, coming down off my anger because I'm like, okay, I know that you're going to. Because it's not only on me, and I can very easily, you know, get really emotionally invested in this. Uh, and again, my emotions are rightly placed in their character. Right? And I don't want them to be, you know, in sin. But. But your help, you Come in and you're like, okay, let me talk to them. And y', all, I was a, uh, I was blessed to be in the room when you talk to our boys. And it blessed me. It blessed me to no end. Because this man sits these two boys on the bed, and the two boys, they look like twins, right? But they're sitting there.

Abraham Hamilton III We're at the table.

Maria Hamilton No, this bed. And he. And they come and they sit on, you know, close to you. In the bed.

Abraham Hamilton III In my bed.

Maria Hamilton And I'm over here acting like I don't listen, but I do listen. I'm listening. And you literally gave them a whole lesson on manhood, on responsibility, on doing everything heartily as unto the Lord, on making sure they understand that this is a training ground for manhood. You did not say to them, clean your room because your mommy said. You see what I'm saying? That's what Nancy Pearce is talking about. We don't feminize them. What we're saying is, like, you set the expectation for them to understand what manhood really looks like. Obedience, respect, uh, responsibility, reliability, and trustworthiness. Reliability, integrity, trustworthiness. Those are things that these boys were rebelling against. That's civility. But we're talking about biblical manhood. So for you to sit them down and talk to them man to man, if you will. Right. Letting them know, like, I'm expecting you to understand that these things that are implemented in our home, because we expect you to clean your bathroom and your room every week, is that you are growing to be becoming a man.

Abraham Hamilton III Mhm. Yeah. Well, I didn't know you were going to share that, but. Well, glory to God for that. But that. That's a part of it. And. And God has given us as men, a particular grace and an anointing to convey to our boys in particular, what is required of them. And while we want them to enjoy their adolescence, my job is for my boys to become men. Amen. Um, and if the Lord tarries, there will be men far longer on this side of eternity than there will be boys. And they need to understand the things that we're implementing in them is to prepare them for manhood, not to have them having a protracted adolescence. And so, uh, they. They identified with that. And here's the thing. Boys want to become men. So when we speak to the men in them and call the man and the king to arise, we often find that our boys will meet that moment.

Maria Hamilton The views and opinions expressed in this broadcast may not necessarily reflect those of the American Family association or American family.

Abraham Hamilton III Rad.